Dazed Off

drunk and drained

ever since the thought of things go away too fast

got in my mind

i desperately try to remember every moment, every detail, every noise
it gets me drunk and drained
but i love listening to stories i didn't understand clearly
i love seeing flaws of people that didn't made them less pretty
i love spacing out while being surrounded
even as though it feels too much
it feels less,
maybe because they aren't really there
or maybe i wasn't really there

it's something like being present and lost at the same time

you can't choose both
either you remember it forever, or it becomes a locked memory,
blurry and buried for a reason;
standing as a protection

and nostalgia and deja vu takes over as hints, as traces

that's what scares me the most
it's being asked "what are your highschool core memories?"

then the only thing i can recall is
feeling all at once and nothing at all

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A/N:
being overwhelmed isn't the word i was looking for