Hazbin Hotel Headcanons and Randomness

Zestial x Reader (Gender Neutral)

-Most of his nicknames for you will be very old-fashioned and poetic, as is his speech. Don't ever expect to be called, 'babe', but do expect to be called things like 'sweeter sounding than the lyre, and more golden than gold', as well as 'my beloved', and 'my dearest'

-He will take you on a lot of walks in the forests outside of Pentagram City. Being a spider demon, he has an appreciation for the aspects of nature that aren't typically considered beautiful, and instead of showing you meadows, he'll show you streams, rock pools, and tall trees

-If he finds some cool-looking rocks while exploring in the forest, he'll have them made into a bracelet or necklace for you. If he finds a cool-looking leaf, he'll have it pressed into a bookmark for you

-When the walks are over, he'll take you back to his home. He'll make you tea and light the fireplace before you curl up together with some good books

-Zestial loves reading, especially books from his time period, though he's open to reading just about anything as long as it's good. His book recommendations will blow your mind, as he knows all of the best books written in the past three hundred years

-A lot of your dates involve going to antique bookstores, and seeing what you can find. One time, he found a signed copy of one of H.P Lovecraft's original books for you

-Lots of your dates will involve going to antique stores full stop, as Zestial loves finding things from his time period in them. He'll be able to tell you whether something is real or fake just by looking

-He knows where to get the best tea in Pride, and he'll often take you shopping for new blends, as well as new teacups and pots. He likes to surprise you by buying cool-looking teacups for you

-He'll also take you for afternoon tea at the best Victorian cafes in Pride. Afternoons spent eating cake, drinking tea, and gossiping about everyone in Pride are the best, at least for you and him

-There will be lots of picnics in the park, or in the forest, when you go on lunch dates, especially in Hell's equivalent of summer

-Speaking of summer, you'll be going skinny dipping in lakes together, a lot. Zestial isn't much of a swimmer, but he likes seeing you show off your body

-Zestial doesn't have much of a sex drive, and will probably not want to fuck until you get married, as waiting for marriage was the standard in his time. He says that he wants his first time to be with his true love, AKA, you

-He'll likely propose to you during a picnic in the forest, and he'll have the ring made with your favorite stones

-The wedding will be a summer wedding in the middle of your favorite forest, and all of Pride's overlords will be attending, of course

-When you have sex for the first time on your wedding night, the sex is beautiful, but terrifying. Zestial in his full demon form is super hot, but he will likely bite you and leave sticky webs everywhere. Monsterfuckers rejoice