The archive of the forgotten

Yves' smile

Yves hasn't changed much since the last four years. Although his smile, his smile is different. He does seem to be able to feel joy but it is almost as if he is missing a part. We walk through the streets of london while talking about his new book and my new medical journey. "Charité right? Are you following in the footsteps of Ehrlich, Koch and Behring?" I nod, "I am still not certain whether I feel comfortable leaving England." "Akiva, think about it, this will be leading research position, it is incredibly rare to get an offer like this." I shrug. I don't want to leave England, my whole life is here. I don't want to abandon Yves. But I might be overthinking it.

Yves

I walk into the manor and take off my hat. "Yves" Frances exclaims as she walks up to me and gives me my cousin. I hush the baby as he's crying. Frances has decided to raise the baby of a too young maid that couldn't afford to raise him. So now Frances has a son, but she is absolutely freaked out that she is not mature enough. I rock him back and forth till he stops crying. "Hello little Étienne" I say while I softly hold his hand and he begins to laugh. I smile, what a beautiful boy. "You should relax Frances, I will take care of Étienne for the time being." I say as I peck her on her cheek. "how is Eleanor doing? Is the writing progressing?" I ask. Frances nods and dries her tears. "Frances, don't forget that there's no shame in a nanny." "I promised Lisa to take care of him, I need to keep that promise." "But nannies aren't always bad Frances, I promise."

I look at Étienne, he is already almost sleeping. I decide to put him to bed. I walk through the long halls of the manor, I must say that I miss my parents. It was hard to lose so many people in one year. But life makes us stronger with every challenge we survive. I smile as I look at the tiny innocent human drift into the land of the dreams. I close the door when Charlie runs into me. I grab his collar so he doesn't fall flat on his face, "I suggest a bit of a slower pace in the halls if you don't look where you are going." I say with a smile. Charlie smiles and hugs me "Yes dad." He slowly jogs away. "And try to be a little more quiet, somebody is sleeping here!"

I walk into the sitting room and take a deep breath as I pour a glass of scotch. It has been a long day, I close my eyes and feel the hand of Cyril on my shoulder. I smile, I can't forget him, I will never forget him. I know that, but sometimes I wish I could. Because even though he has taught me how to live, how to be myself, how to be proud of who I am, he has taught me to see the beauty in the world but sometimes I wish he could've shown me without dying. I feel a tear on my face, I feel a hand on my shoulder. It startles me. I open my eyes and immediately turn around.

"I hope I didn't startle you" Laurie says, Laurence married Frances. He knew the conditions and what was going on, but he doesn't know about me an Cyril. Why would he? It is not important anymore, even when it once was the sun in my sky, the roses to my rope, the gravestone in the rain. I smile, "I am sorry to say that you did startle me" I say with a smile. His green eyes look at mine, his light brown hair beautifully frames his face and a slight smile paints his face. We both look at our supposed wives playing chess. "Do you love her?" He asks, "You have no idea." I respond. "I do not mean like that Yves, I mean.....loving somebody, the way people normally love." I smile. "What in the world is normal about all of this?" I ask. "You have a point." Laurie is a painter himself, which was one of the reasons Frances liked him. He admires her, that I know. But Laurie is hard to read, I do not understand why he decided to marry her. "Do you." "I....I admire her. I will protect her. But I do not love her that way." He says.

We smile as we sit down, he begins to sketch, I look at his concentrated face, he reminds me of Cyril. But not enough to hurt me, he is the perfect mix of Frances and Cyril. I smile as he looks up from his sketchbook. "You look beautiful today." Laurie says with a smile. I feel a knot in my stomach and my cheeks feel warm as the blood rushes towards it. "Thank you, you have nothing to complain about either" I say while I chuckle. "I have heard you were friends with Oscar Wilde." I nod. "That is correct" I say with a bittersweet smile, I hated hearing about the trial, it almost felt like it was Cyril standing there, Maybe I felt like I was standing there. "I was friends with Bosie and Oscar actually, I am still flabbergasted how Bosie had the absolute nerve to betray his lover like that." I frown, normally people shame Oscar, not Bosie. "I couldn't agree more."

He shows me the sketch. I smile, I can't help it. It's a portrait of me "I am sorry, I couldn't get your eyes right. How could I ever steal the stars from the nightsky and put them in a sketch." I look at Laurie. Laurie hesitantly touches my hair. I smile, "Would you like to join me at the opera tomorrow?" "How could I say no?" He whispers.

I sit down in front of the grave and put down new flowers. "Good evening Cyril." I sigh. "I believe I....have feelings for somebody." I smile. "Please be happy for me."

Alright so this might or might not be what happened after TMDF. You can decide