The archive of the forgotten

blueberry Muffins

William Blake theorised that to love was to be in tune with the divine. I thought it was utter nonsense but, maybe I spoke too soo.

When I met Evelyn he lit up my life. It is a feeling not even the most skilled poet could write down, Keats would stutter, Shakespeare would be speechless, Wilde would faint, and Byron would run away and hide. Their words would no longer be enough for this person. This perfection, this muse that'll always haunt me if I had not caught him.

But I did catch him, or more so, he caught me. And now my days start with the beautiful whisper of "Good morning sunshine." in the most beautiful voice in the world, and I open my eyes to see the most beautiful man in the world. His long black locks brushing my shoulders and his hesitant freckles adorning his pale shoulders around his tattoos.

Divine love is what I feel as we danced through the kitchen to the most beautiful bach tunes, or the most ridiculous rock, singing along to the Smiths. No matter what he looked beautiful, he felt like an angel, he spoke like a poet. There is nothing my Evelyn doesn't have, and I am his everything. I still do not understand how lucky I must've been, how lucky I am.

I have been dating my Evelyn for five years now, we've grown so much, together and apart, it is perfect and the perfection only seems to grow. I know he likes the smell of the sea, the sound of me typing on the typewriter, the smell of books, the music of Bach, The smiths, silk pyjamas, the smell of waffles in the morning but most importantly he likes me. I still find it hard to believe sometimes but he really loves me. I will forever wonder why.
I am not handsome, my glasses are too big for my head, my dark brown curls are messy, and I've never had a good sense of style
I am not talented, I can't play the piano like Evelyn or dance like he does, all I can to is write and make photographs, I capture the beauty of other people, not of myself.
I am.... me. I am simply Reid, but he loves me so much.

"Good morning Sunshine." He whispers in my ear.
I smile as my eyes flutter open and he hands me my glasses so I will see more than the bague colours of my love.
"There you are." He says as I put on my glasses. I see his beautiful smile and smell the waffles baking in the kitchen. I step out of bed and kiss him, he twirls me around.
"Goodmorning My evelyn." I whisper as I kiss his forehead.

We walk to the kitchen and he puts my breakfast on my plate as I start brewing coffee for us.
"Do you have work today darling?" I ask.
"I have some patients this morning, and tonight I have a performance of Chopin in the concerthall. But I kept early evening open so we can bake blueberry muffins as I promised." He says with a smile as he licks his finger because he spilled some syrup.
I look at him lovingly and look at the beautiful blouse he is wearing, probably chanel, I think to myself.
"You need to eat." I say as I grab his hand. He quickly srga his hand away as if the word eat sent an electric shock through him.
"I will." He lies. "But I am already almost late to work." He says as he packs his lunch into the beautiful leather bag.
I kiss him goodbye and grab my camera.
I sit down on the windowsill and wait till he passes the window like every morning.
"Evelyn" I shout, he turns around and blows a kiss as I take a picture.

He looks immaculate, as always.
I sit back down at the table and start eating. Evelyn is a psychiatrist and in the evening he plays for a great orchestra, he is pretty famous for it actually. Because he was born into a rich family I don't have to work which means I can dedicate all my time to photography, I've been incredibly succeful with my last collections, all of them surrounding my love for Evelyn, he is my muse and my partner.

A few hours later the door opens.
"I'm home early." He yells as he walks towards the kitchen.
"Let's start!" I say as excitedly as a kid. But than I recognise the slight sadness in his eyes, he smiles and I try my best to ignore it.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask as I break the eggs.
"No, I want to have fun with you my love."
I nod and put the sugar in the bowl,
"Look the crystals are glowing" He says with a chuckle and I admire him for a moment, how he can see the magic in everything that is so mundane for us.
"Boil some water will you?" I say with a chuckle.
"We don't nee..." I interrupt him "For tea you idiot." He chuckle and nods. 

I am mixing the ingrediants when he hugs me from behind and whispers in my ear.
"Reid, you are the only thing in my life that I did right."
I feel a tear in my eye, the darker side of Evelyn is not very present, but he is a broken man, I knew that when I fell in love with him and I know that now.
I caress his cheek. "You are perfection to me my love." He kisses my neck and I smile.
I give him the whisk and he licks it.
"Eww!"
"Oh come on, we were done already." He says as he pours the batter in the molds and puts it in the oven.
He puts on O children by nick cave and the bad seeds and climbs onto the cooking island and begins to sing it into the makeshift microphone that is supposed to be a whisk. I shake my head as I admire the man I will marry one day. My evelyn, my sunshine, my blueberry muffin. 

I hear the alarm of the oven and take out the muffins but the alarm doesn't stop. The annoying beeping keeps going on and on.
"I love you." Evelyn says and I smile in confusion

but then I open my eyes and feel my hands on his empty side of the bed. My eyes fill with tears as I look up to the vase with one of his wilted funeral flowers. Divine love, to be destroyed by the one you love most.