will we talk? {sam fender}

85

"sam open the door!" i bang on his front door, he still hasn't moved out of the house that was his and deans, i think he's scared to let it go.

the door finally swings open and sam is stood there, he looks shocked "oh hiya darlin"

"i'm so sorry" i sniff yanking him into arms "sam i love you. you can talk to me lover. please talk to me"

he chuckles into my hair walking me into the house "i don't know what your on about lac"

"sam..." i start, my stomach twists at the thought of asking him "we need to talk about us. we quite obviously have not been great lately"

his eyebrows furrow and we go into the living room where we sit on the black leather sofa.

"are you okay?" i ask sam once we're comfortable "i mean mentally because sophie told me when your not okay mentally you get it out through anger and well..."

his facial expression changes and i can tell he knows what i'm about to say "i know i've been a cunt lately" he says

i smile gently "i wouldn't go as far as that it's just" i hesitate "it just feels like your constantly mad at me"

he frowns and takes my hands in his "sometimes sam it just makes me feel like shit" i tell him, i watch as the tears glisten in his eyes "shit lover i didn't mean to make you cry" i say cupping my hands on his cheeks

"sorry. god i'm so sorry" he sighs

"what's going on? are you okay?" i ask him, i'm going to get to the bottom of this, i'm not letting him ruin our relationship just because he isn't getting the help he needs

he huffs and looks away from me wiping his hands across his face "i don't know what's wrong with me"

i place my hand on his chin spinning his face so i can see his face "what do you mean?"

"with the production of the new album, us not having time to see each other, the press, the fans-" he sighs "there's so much going on and i feel lost in it all"

i don't know what to say, it's rare for sam to tell
me all of his feelings. it must feel good for him to get it all out though, especially when he feels he normally can't

"and it makes me angry" he huffs "angry that i can't feel like myself anymore because of this stupid career and angry that i can't even see my own girlfriend because of the way our lives are"

"oh sam" i say wiping a tear from his cheek

"i'm sorry. i know i shouldn't be taking it out on you but once i get alcohol in me i start to forget about everything wrong with my life and
i feel free again. but also when i get the alcohol in me i forget what i'm doing and i get angry with you when your the last person i should be angry at"

his pain puts me in pain, and seeing him cry while confessing everything to me. i just want to make everything better for him.

"i'm going to spin your own advice back around on you now... maybe you should see a therapist" i suggest nervously

he must see how nervous i am because he smiles at me "maybe that's a good idea. come here" he pulls me into a hug.

i nuzzle my head into the crook of his neck and place a gentle kiss on his jaw line "i love you"

"i love you t-"

he is cut off by both of our phones buzzing rapidly with notifications, we both grab our phones at the urgency of the notifications.

sophie: in labour
sophie: i'm in fucking labour
sophie: get to the hospital right now
sophie: mum is in fucking spain
sophie: i'm not due for another month
sophie: help
sophie: help lacy
sophie: dean is panicking
sophie: you and sam have to get here now
sophie: i need you for moral support
sophie: i don't think dean will be able to handle this if sam isn't there

"shit" i gasp, dean must be messaging sam in a panic too because sams mouth is hung wide open

"we need to go" i say in urgency, i stand up and drag sam with me. i chuck his shoes at him

"lac i don't want to watch her give birth" sam groans "that's gross"

"oh for fuck sake sam you don't have to stare at her vagina, you just need to make sure dean doesn't pass out" i laugh at him tying my shoes as fast as i can

"i did not sign up for this" he says as i pull him out of the front door and to his car, he gets in the drivers side

"ah we're about to become godparents!" i smile the excitement hitting me "what do godparents actually do?"

"i don't know but it's cool to say"