My Savior 🔞 ( Part One )

All I want..

I was in shock. My stomach was already swirling inside.. I was silent for way too long because the police officer started to wave his hand in front of  my face.
"Mr. O'Hara. I really hope you're not going to vomit or faint. Come and get your machine"
I got back to my senses. My head was still spinning , I was still feeling weak. I kept distance for  almost  7 weeks which my parents hated but I was too stupid to care. I hated that robot. Or... I wanted to hate.  I hoped if I stay away my weird feelings die and it will hurt less . I was too stubborn and in the meantime my own anger blinded me , making me unable to see how he was still trying to help . He was holding out his arm for me to take it, so I won't fall into the abyss of self-destruction..
"Hello...?? Boy, if you're high I'll need to..."
I snapped back to reality. My chest was moving violently as my heart was racing inside.
"Can he speak?? Where is he now?"
"He?"
I rolled my eyes and hurried out. By that I mean, hurry as much as I could with this fatigue.
The car was standing in front our gate. The policeman was in my heels
"Wait up! You're not going anywhere without me!"
I barely heard him anymore. I wanted to tear the car's door up. But the guy grabbed my hand with a frown on his face
"Slow down boy. There is nothing to hurry for"
"Just let me have him back and you can leave!"
He gave me a warning look. I didn't want problem now, I didn't need him to drag my ass to the police station. How am I supposed to take care of the dummy if I'm sitting in a cell ?
"Fine..."
He then opened the door and leaned in. With the most careless move he pulled a certain humanoid out. My jaw dropped , my heart clenched. He looked worse than I expected. That handsome face which I began to like more and more, now it was humiliated with black paint..his arm, it was twisted out. It raised my anger. What happened ?? Or who?? Why?
"Miles... "
I tried to hold him by his arm .  The other man grimaced
"Take this machine and good luck. I heard it costs a fortune to get them repaired. And sure this one need it"
I even forget to thank him for bringing Miles home. I was so worried. I walked him back into the house. My anger for him left my heart. I felt bad. Someone blinded him..someone *hurt* him.
"I'm here, I'm here now... What the hell happened? "
I placed my hand on his face to make him know I'm close and I'm not mad anymore. Deep inside I felt, I had a part of this massacre..
"Will.."
He tried to move his arm but couldn't. It made awful noise. For once I was glad he couldn't feel anything. I didn't want him in pain...
"Talk to me.. where were you? Why would you go out alone this late ..?"
Unbothered by his ruined look, I leaned in to peck his face
"I felt bad. You've been avoiding me for weeks. You pretended I didn't exist. You didn't listen, I had to watch you ruin your life and the progress we were making. I wanted to make it right.."
Another stab in my heart. I deserved it. I knew. I so knew it was partly my fault.
"..I thought if I go to Miss Lorette and ask her to come over , maybe you two could talk things out. I was willing to apologize her. But .."
"But? Did someone catch you on the way? Lorette is the past . I beg you to forget her.. "
He lowered his gaze , even though he couldn't see me at all
"It appears, she has a brother. And they both hate my kind. On top of it, she told him about us and how we hurt her feelings"
I knew Lorette had a brother. He was 2 years older than me. That fucking bastard!
"Did Philip do this?? I'll tell dad! That shitface will pay for it! Literally too!"
I was angry. I wanted to go there to punch him till he breathes. But I shouldn't.
"I'm sorry... I wish I wasn't an asshole. I didn't want this to happen "
"Will, I don't feel pain, don't apologize. I just wanted to fix things so you could stay motivated. If you had someone by your side. Someone who's flesh and bone like you "
It hurt once again. Our feelings will never be mutual. He won't feel anything towards me. I had enough time to think about it while I was filled with pain and frustration. But even if he can't return my feelings... I didn't want him anywhere else but here, with me.
"Miles... I'm sorry. Never leave me , please.. I know you told me. But I can't accept.. I can't. "
I reached out for his hand. Stroked it with my thumb. How could that jerk destroy him like this?
"Will.. you're kind to me, I would never give up on you. But I can't stay forever . Please understand. You'll find someone . New personality , new behavior and attitude. You have charm. With positive change, it'll be easy for you to settle down with anyo..."
I can't deal with this. I've never felt bigger pain. My loneliness was a part of me . But this.. feeling this for someone who just got into my life unexpectedly.  Why him? I can't win this. Not only he's not a human but can't even stay ....
"I fucking fell for you dumbass...!"
It came out so honestly. At this point there was no meaning of denying .
".. I can't let you go . Even...even if you can't feel anything.. I never felt this way before.. please..."
He was silent. I understood. What did I expect? Maybe, even if he was human , why would he love someone like me? I didn't deserve happiness anyway. And here I am , just whining ..
"We'll manage. I don't want to let you down. You're my first.. I don't want to have new partners again and again, even if my memory will be reseted everytime. I want to feel like humans do"
His voice was serious and sad. I sensed he was longing for something too. I don't know how can I help with his desire , but it seemed, he wasn't ready to go either
"I want to love you.."
I couldn't believe my ears. He just...said...what ?
I wiped my tear down. Helped him up to hug him close. Maybe it wasn't a impossible scenario.. who knows..
It was a long day, and I had to prepare myself for tomorrow to tell this my father. I was already nervous to think about his reaction.
"In the end..maybe I'm not that straight.."
I whispered and nuzzled into his neck
"What a surprise?..we kissed twice and you wanted to have sex with me"
He replied on a sassy tone but I didn't mind. Perhaps, the world wasn't a shitty place after all .
"Be my secret for now ... Please . I need to figure out how to handle things..give me time.. I really want you, as...as...my lover "
I didn't even need to look up to know that he smiled. I take that, he was struggling the same way I was . But silently , while I was whining non stop . Intimacy wasn't the top thing he wanted. Now I understood what he meant by *satisfying your desires*
I walked him to my bedroom. Since I fucked the bathroom up and it was a complete mess. After making him sit, I did all I could . As I wasn't sure what to use to clean off the paint, I decided not to touch. I didn't want to ruin his face...I mean more than it was now.
"Your arm..it..is just hanging. It freaks me out"
"Good that I can't feel pain"
I agreed. It was kind of difficult, but I helped him change into clean clothes.
"You're the best who could happen to me.. forgive me. I'm so stupid. I hated how I got rejected.. I'm used to getting anything I want. But you're different.. I need to respect you and treat you like any other living creature.."
He was smiling and almost purring. Who would have suspected that my first love will be not only another guy, but a robot..  it felt so bittersweet.
"You're so gorgeous..no matter what.."
In the meantime I was already planning how to fuck up that asshole. No one will get away after *hurting* this man. Even if it means that I have to do the same to them...