My Savior 🔞 ( Part One )

Bittersweet feelings

After my meeting with Hector, I went home. I still felt the aftershock in my body—it trembled slightly with the sweet pleasure. Miles greeted me the very moment I got back. I swear, sometimes it felt like he was just a golden retriever in a humanoid's body.

"Welcome home. How was the meeting? What did he want? If it's nothing personal, of course."

He embraced me so tightly, and now I felt like a piece of shit. Miles had been nothing but sweet, helpful, and caring so far. And I really loved him. Yet... I let his owner dominate me, and I even liked it. How am I supposed to face him? How am I supposed to look him in the eye?

"It... it was okay. We just talked some..."

I mumbled. But he's not stupid, I’m sure he’ll figure it out. It’s complicated. I could do literally anything—Miles has no feelings. I mean, it’s like he does. He looks emotionally stable, very positive, and most of the time, smiley. And here I am betraying him and his trust. Also, not as if he and I were a couple. But that’s no excuse to cheat... to cheat so easily. With someone I barely know and don’t even like. But here we are.

"I'm glad you didn't regret meeting up. I told you he's a nice person once you get to know him."

"Yeah... I bet. But let's not talk about it..."

He cupped my chin and turned my face toward him. I hated this. Now I could hardly separate them. I was feeling vulnerable again. Shy, too—the same way I felt an hour ago.

"Did he say something bad? Will, he's my owner, but if he did something to you, I'll talk to him."

My heart was aching. Hector did nothing bad. On the contrary. He was trying to help in his weird way. Yes, we had sex, but I let it happen.

"Miles... it's not necessary. I love you, okay? I'm sorry. I don't deserve you at all... but I can't be without you."

He looked confused.

"Be a good boy for me, alright?"

That's it. Be a good boy for me. That’s what he said too before bending me over his table.

"Will, don't cry, please. You're free to tell me what happened. But if you don't want to, it's okay. I'm here to support you in any possible way."

He's perfect. A humanoid who's more human than me. I'm full of flaws, and he still accepts me. I can't do this. I can't do this to him—or to us.

"Miles... don't leave me, please. Even if I tell you... I can't live if you're not here by my side."

He pulled me into his arms so gently. Wrapped his arms around me, rubbing my back while placing kisses on the top of my head.

"Anything you want to tell me, go ahead. I won't judge. I'm not leaving."

I dried my tears, took a deep breath. He had to know. My heart felt heavy with guilt.

"We talked about things... he said he'd let me have you if... if I... go..."

I needed a moment. This is bad. I’m a horrible person. Miles was so good to me all the time, and I go screw with the first guy who looks like him.

"...he asked me on dates. He said... if I still want you at the end of the third month... I'm free to have you as my own."

"And what did you say...?"

"If it means you’ll be mine, then I swallow my pride and go on a few dates. It means nothing to me."

"You shouldn't feel bad. If it means nothing to you, then why not? And he's human—you two can get to know each other."

"We had sex!"

It burst out of me. Miles' eyes widened. As if he was imagining the scenario.

"I didn't even hesitate... I didn't dislike it. I wanted it too... I'm sorry. I promise it won't happen again."

He sighed and patted my head. His silence was killing me. Say something!

"It's fine. If you wanted to, it's okay. I knew he wouldn't force himself on anyone. If you liked it, then there—"

"Miles! I fucking cheated! I get that you don't have feelings, but why can't you see that it's bad? Say something! Say you're disappointed!"

But how could he be disappointed or mad? In the end, he is a robot... I should get used to it. I love him, but he will never show any kind of emotions that help me feel loved. It’s... so hard. I know he cares, I know he likes me... but I can’t feel the love I want. But can I blame him? He's not human... and never will be.

"Will, I'm sorry. I know what you did is kind of bad, but remember that I just can't feel specific emotions. Therefore, it’d be hypocritical of me to say that I'm mad at you or disappointed."

Now I was disappointed. Why did my heart have to pick someone who is not able to show love...

It was so painful. What’s the use in being better when my heart keeps aching more than before?

"Whatever... I'm going out. I can't expect you to understand, and I shouldn’t be mad at you for it either..."

As much as I loved him... I wish I didn’t. Because every day life reminds me that as long as I live, I will never be loved.

---

Hector’s POV

It’s been hours and I still can’t shake it out of my mind.

You’d think I’m just some hijo de puta, but I’m not. I don’t plan to play with that boy and his feelings.

The thing is, my humanoids are there to help people—with their bad decisions, with their depression, with their mental illnesses. But they are not meant to show any kind of emotions. It’s literally impossible. With Miles, something went wrong, and I still couldn’t figure out what.

What that boy is doing is not okay and not healthy. I’m not blaming him. I know those kinds of children—rich, spoiled with material things but neglected by parents. Now he has someone who genuinely cares. Why? Because that’s what Miles is supposed to do.

I want Will to understand that it’s not real love. I want him to move on. I don’t want him to fall for me. But I want him to notice that it’s all about the company—someone who gives him attention. I can do that too. He’s not a lost case, and I can see that. He’s just a child, and I only blame his parents. I was lucky that my parents spent so much time with me. Maybe because I came from a poor family.

I just have to find a way to help him move on while not being way too close to make him fall for me. Hurting him is the last thing I want. Besides, if I wanted Miles back, I could involve the police already. But it’s no longer about my humanoid. Frankly, it’s the first time a human has shown strong emotions toward a simple object—and it won’t end well. I just know.