Dance In The Rain

~56~ Don't Apologize Yet

Tate's POV

Sylvie tries to talk a little while we finish eating, but even she gives up after a bit when none of us acknowledge her..Well, Jules does but it's short and sweet.

After I'm done eating I can't stomach sitting with Holden and the awkwardness, so I throw my paper plate away and take my soda to our room.

I go to shut the door, and then remember that Holden destroyed it when he kicked it like a maniac, so now we have no door.

That's freaking fantastic.

Julianne goes into the room a bit later and ignores me as she sits on her bed—And that rejection hurts me too. It hurts me more than I expected, so I just lie on my side facing the wall and let my tears fall silently.

A while later I hear heavy footfall, but I don't turn when they stop at our door.

"Annie, the door had nothing to do with you. You wanna go in my room and shut the door for a bit? I'll stay out with Sylvie so you can have time to yourself."

"I'm fine." She says simply, and I hear him walk into the room now.

"You need to get some sleep...I don't think you've slept much either," he says as he sits on her bed, and I hear him kissing her.

"I will in a little bit," she yawns.

He returns her yawn with one of his own, and then gets off the bed.

Tears start to well in my eyes because I know he's going to just walk out; but when I hear him stop by my bed, I turn and meet his sad, tired gaze.

He sighs as he bends and kisses my temple. "We will work this out, Tate," he simply says as he taps me gently on the hip and walks out the door.

And the tears fall freely again.

~*~

I'm not asleep, but I think Julianne is. She shut off the light about an hour ago and I haven't heard much from her.

My damn tears haven't really stopped, and I'm pissed at just how much of a baby I've become since moving here.

I actually don't know what the hell I want anymore. I crave my freedom and my friends, but...Having Holden and Julianne around feels good. It feels...Shit. I'm turning into a sap.

I feel her nudge me to scoot over, and I turn in confusion. I look at her and she gives me a sad smile.

"I'm glad you're still here tonight," she whispers, and I return her sad smile with a pathetic grimace of my own. I scoot and move the covers, tucking her in around them when she climbs in. She puts her head on my pillow and rests her cheek on my shoulder.

She surprises me when she wraps her arm around my stomach, and I move so her head is tucked into my pit and my arm is around her.

"I'm afraid to ask how badly I hurt him," I cry, not even bothering to wipe away my tears as they drip into Julianne's hair.

"Bad"

"What do I do?" I beg, and I feel her shrug.

"I don't know, Tate. You turned into your old self so easily, and you...Why did you hide the drugs under my bed?"

I feel sick as I hug her tighter. "I'm sorry...Apparently he's a freaking psychic because he said exactly why I did it. Holden never would've checked your stuff. I've been waiting for him to check mine since we got here."

"Did you bring it from Cali?"

When I stay silent, she stiffens. "Tell me. After all the shit you just put us through, I deserve to know..not to mention that you also took off...when you made me feel like complete shit for doing it too..."