i know the end ,, harry potter

chapter thirty-six

ALYRA SAT ALONE near the end of the hufflepuff table, no longer having cedric to sit next to anymore. she thought about sitting near clara and eleanor and aurora but, decided against it as the three seemed deep in a conversation when she walked in, so she decided to sit off on her own wherever she could find someplace. she hadn't seen stella yet. she spoke to the girl briefly over break, receiving a letter or two from her, but they were just short and sweet, saying she missed alyra and that she'd be back this term.

alyra looked down at the plate she'd made for herself from the feast before her, taking a couple of bites before dropping the fork, a seemingly permanent frown planted on her face as she looked around. everyone looked so happy to be there, but she couldn't bring herself to feel it.

she wanted to badly to get out of the manor that she forgot what it was like there. she still had basically no one, just as she did at home. she should've listened to dumbledore that day in harry's dorm, she shouldn't have let him go. she shouldn't have ruined everything she had with harry.

'you're a ruiner. you ruin things. it's all your good at.' the voice in her head sounded, usually when the voice up there said anything negatively towards her, it sounded much like her father.

her eyes felt heavy and her head hurt. she seemed to have had a permanent headache over the entirety of their break. a permanent frown and a permanent headache. nothing was permanent except the bad things. nothings ever permanent.

she missed harry. harry was right in the same room as her. she looked up, she saw his eyes on her, worry behind the green. she looked away, not daring to meet his gaze again, she didn't like the way he was looking at her now. like she was someone to feel bad for. it wasn't the usual "harry look" it was a new one. and she didn't like it. she didn't like it at all.

"good evening, children." dumbledore spoke to the students in the hall, "now, we have two changes in staffing this year. we are pleased to welcome back professor grubbly-plank who will be taking care of magical creatures while professor hagrid is on temporary leave. we also wish to welcome our new defense against the dark arts teacher professor delores umbridge."

alyras gaze went towards a very brightly colored woman. the amount of pink on her person making the blonde want to puke. she made eye contact with her godfather who sat beside the insanely pink woman and they shared a look of 'why-does-she-look-like-that?'. alyra had always had a special bond with her godfather, she knew he was one of the people he could really always lean on, that he would always be there even if he didn't really show he cared as much as he did, she always knew he did care. he always cared about her.

like the time her own father performed the cruciatus curse upon his own daughter and snape had been the one who showed up later that day to make sure the young girl was okay and took her into hogsmeade in attempts to cheer her up, the attempt working out in his favor.

"and i'm sure you'll all join me in wishing the professor good luck." dumbledore continued, "we usual, our caretaker, mr. filch has asked me to..."

alyras eyebrows raised as the headmaster was interrupted by a 'hem hem' from the woman dressed from head to toe in the bright pink, and she shared another look with snape as she arose from her seat and walked forward before beginning to speak, "thank you, headmaster, for those kind words of welcome. and how lovely to see all your bright, happy faces smiling up at me. i'm sure you will have all going to be very good friends. the ministry of magic has always considered the education of young witches and wizards to be of vital importance. although each headmaster has brought something new to this historic school..." she looked towards dumbledore, who smiled at her before returning to a glare directly after she looked away,
"...progress for the sake of progress must be discouraged. let us preserve what must be preserved perfect what can be perfected and prune practices that ought to be... prohibited."