𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑯𝒊𝒅𝒅𝒆𝒏 𝑪𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒔

𝗕𝗼𝗻𝘂𝘀 𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝟭

The chilling winds of December blew through the gaps in the closed window kissing her belly bump, making Nehmat shiver. She pushed her chair closer to the fireplace and wrapped a blanket tightly around her. Her fingers pecked out from the blanket, clutching the crumpled letters. She had kept these letters safe in her cupboard but had forgotten about them until Vamika, who had now claimed her old room for the comfort it brought her, found them while emptying the cupboard. Vamika had handed the letters to her just before Nehmat left for Switzerland for a change of scenery, hoping to alleviate the nausea and discomfort of her seventh month of pregnancy. The trip did help her; the Alps once again calmed her inner struggle.

Wait! I have a really bad habit of jumping from one topic to another without giving the backstory, Nehmat thought to herself as she recalled the past with her eyes closed and her head resting on the rocking chair. She smiled and blushed, remembering December 15th, the day they got married. They had recently celebrated their second anniversary in Kashmir before coming to Switzerland for some relaxation along with his family. Unfortunately, her brother's family couldn't join her as they were on a family vacation, exploring the streets of Australia with two-year-old baby Akaay. Yes, it was a baby boy, and Vamika's happiness knew no bounds as she finally had a sibling. Even though Vamika was eight years old now, she still clung to her Nini, and now Akaay had joined the party. Akaay would call her 'Nini,' too a word he picked up from Vamika. After "Mumma" and "Daddy," it was his favourite.

Back to herself, it had been two years since she married the man she loved, and every day felt like a dream. Two months after he proposed, they decided to get married in a small, intimate ceremony with only close friends and family in the Gurudwara of his village. She chuckled as she remembered the day. She was happy and smiling, while her paaji, Vamika, and Shubman were emotional, tearing up now and then. She teased them, "Oh, stop being crybabies! I'm the bride, not you guys!" As soon as she said that, she felt a gentle slap on her back from her mother. "Nini, behave like one," her mother scolded, while the other three teased her by poking their tongues out.

Nehmat scowled and pouted, looking at the door, but her expression instantly turned into a blush as the man next to her whispered in her ear, "So, Nehmat Kohli, ready to be mine?" She smiled, looking up with her eyes shining bright like kaleeras. Thanks to the photographers who captured the moment of them looking at each other, she had the photo framed in their room, occupying the space above their bed. It was such a beautiful day, and indeed a day where she felt all the heaviness of her heart shattering. On that day, in front of the Almighty, she decided to forgive Meera, as she wanted to be free from all sorts of thoughts that could hinder her growth. She left it to the Almighty to decide what to do with Meera and the things she had done. Nehmat prayed that wherever Meera found love, it would be reciprocated, and the Almighty did hear her. Meera found her love in a man she worked with, and they had a one-year-old baby girl.

Nehmat was clear that she did not have a problem with her cousin's bonding, but the relationship between her and Meera would be only formal. She could forgive, but she would not forget.

She traced the rim of the glass of orange juice that her Mumma had set down for her a few minutes ago. Yes, her Mumma had joined her for the trip, apologizing to no one in particular. She mentally scolded herself for not mentioning it earlier; her thoughts were all over the place and making her forgetful.

Returning to the letters, she rested her glasses on the brim of her nose before opening one. Taking a sip of her orange juice, she glanced at the clock; it read 5:30 in the evening. She had two hours to read this before he came back from the gym. Opening the first letter, she started scanning its words. Tears welled up in her eyes as she absorbed the contents. Each letter contained many words, but in the end, they all conveyed heartbreak and loneliness. Stuffing her blanket between her teeth, she tried not to cry as she read about his pain and agony in her absence. Was she wrong to leave him stranded on an emotional island, grappling with loneliness and heartache? Was her decision to prioritize herself selfish, or was it a necessary step toward her well-being? He, too, was heartbroken, even though he had bedded with lies. The words and his pain in writing made it impossible for her to control her emotions as she let out a sob.