Baby of the team - WSL

part 71

The other girls didnt notice what had happened they didnt realise that she had almost been so desperately exposed. Viv wrapped her arm around the girl and she took a deep breath before they headed out onto the pitch, the kids would see her and she had to seem as good as she could be. She couldnt appear weak and she certainly couldnt worry braeden. He was already so damaged, she couldnt make it worse. Beth, lia, steph and leah looked at the girl slightly worried. She had handled it surprisingly well. She hadnt freaked out or had a panic attack and both the girls and tally were immensely grateful for that. It was a little miracle.

The training session was pretty ok, she liked having the boys watching, she had always loved it when braeden had watched her play football. She loved it when any of her siblings did. She always had. They were who had supported her. She could see certain girls staring at her, checking on her slightly incessantly, while she knew it was warranted and the girls were worried. It would be an understatement to say the state of her arms currently wasnt a reason for concern, she knew that. She understood they were worried. But she was just so tired of it all. She missed when nobody knew and nobody was constantly checking on her, she could no longer get away with doing it and no one finding out. She missed those days. The days when cutting herself fixed everything not just created more issues. But she couldnt stop. It kept her alive. It kept her going.

She tried to brush off how the girls stares were boring into her, the worry radiating off of them, the other girls could obviously see it. Thankfully it wasnt obvious to the boys. Or nancy. That was very fortunate indeed. She would do whatever it took for the girls to think she was ok. She would fake it till she could make it. She had been doing it for years, she had deceived tons of people into thinking she was fine, she wasnt and she never had been. Once the training session was over she jogged over to the boys and hugged braden who pushed her away from him saying 'ew gross your sweaty!' faking a look of disgust at the girl. Tally chuckled and ruffled his hair. 'Sorry bug!' she said smirking as she ruffled harrys hair too. 'Im going to go get changed and then we can go get lunch yeah!' tally said to the boys who nodded.

She walked away from them and towards the changing rooms falling in line with beth who gave her a warm smile with a not very well hidden look of concern and worry, hoping she was ok. 'Im fine beth!' tally said her tone warning the woman to drop it slightly. Beth looked at her and sent her a look. It was a look of kind of worry and slight annoyance that the girl was shutting them out again with a definite hint of not believing the girl one but. . She remembered the day that tally came into her room blood flowing down her arm. She could of died. She could see it happening again quite easily. It made beth terrified especially when she saw the fresh cuts on the girls arms. She couldnt bare the thought of tally cutting herself so deeply she could die. Death was permanent. She did not want the girl to be permanently gone. 'Didnt look fine!' beth muttered. She just wanted the girl to let her in. was that too much to ask. Tally glared at beth. What the hell was she playing at. 'Well maybe you should mind your own business!' tally snapped at the woman before walking off into the changing room alone not wanting to talk to anyone. Especially beth right now. Beth sighed and looked to steph who had come up to her in defeat. She shook her head slightly at steph shrugging. She didnt know how to help the girl. It felt like she was in a downward spiral and beth didnt know how to stop the girl from spinning out. They could loose her.

Steph put her arm around beth trying to reassure her. She knew that beth and well all the girls really were becoming worried about the girl, something had happened since the england camp, she was different. Her and leah werent talking and she was just off. She seemed on edge constantly. It was worrying.

Tally walked into the changing room and she could feel the anger building up inside of her. She grabbed her bag and walked into one of the individual cubicles before beginning to shower. She had a really quick shower not bothering to wash her hair as it would go crazy and she couldnt be dealing with that today. She pulled on her arsenal joggers and long sleeve top with the hoodie over the top before walking out avoiding eye contact with everyone and walking out of the changing room. She could tell the girls were looking at her. She didnt care. She needed out of there. She wanted to see braedy and harry, they would cheer her up. She no longer felt angry about beth. She knew the woman was right. She was annoyed that she was right but she wasnt holding that against her. Well not at that moment anyway.

She dumped her bag back in her cubby and walked down to treatment centre taking a moment to breath and make sure that neither the boys or nancy could tell anything went on before she walked into the room. 'Who wants to get lunch?' she said when she saw the boys. Both nodded and harry got up and skipped over to her holding her hand. She saw nancy look at her and narrowing ehr eyes. Of course she knew that something was off with her. Tally discreetly shook her head. She wasnt doing this now and especially not infront of the boys. Nancy nodded but sent tally a look. Tally knew the conversion would be carried on. She couldnt hide from it forever. But she could certainly try. She and the boys walked up to the lunch room. She guided the boys over to where the food was smiling at the girls who looked somewhat apprehensive when she came in, nervous as to how she was having witnessed her blow up at beth. She needed them to act normally right now, especially because she had harry and braedy with her. They walked over to where the actual food was and began to look. It was a bit high up for harry so he pulled on tallys hand and made grabby hands at her. Having had younger siblings all her life she knew what this meant and she took a deep breath before picking him up. He was surprisingly light and easy to carry.

'What do you guys want?' tally asked as she held harry on her hip with braeden stood next to her. Viv was approached them and said hi to the boys and to tally. 'Can i have pasta and cheese?' harry asked looking at tally as if he was expecting to be told no. tally nodded. 'Of course you can buddy!' she said smiling at the boy while she looked at braedy waiting for his answer. He shrugged. He wasnt great under pressure especially not at making decisions. It was not one of his strong points. 'Do you want pesto and chicken pasta like me?' she asked knowing he liked the same foods as her. He nodded and smiled at her appreciatively. The way that tally acted with the boys was oh so different to how she was normally. Viv found it very interesting to observe. The chef nodded and plated it up for them so tally put harry down so she could grab the food. She grabbed hers and harrys plate with braeden being trusted to carry his own. They made their way over to a table and sat down with each boy on either side of her.

Viv sat down opposite the girl and smiled at the boys. 'Sooo, did you like watching us?' she asked trying to dumb down the accent she had for the younger boy. Harry nodded eagerly. 'It was so cool!' he gushed excitedly. Tally laughed slightly and ruffled his hair before looking at braeden. He didnt respond, or even look up. She nudged him slightly and he looked at her surprised. 'Can you hear us?' she asked with slight concern. He kind of shrugged. It was kind of like he was underwater. But it was fine. He didnt care. He could lip read. 'Maybe the battery is going?' tally suggested not sure why his hearing aids had suddenly chosen not to work. Braden shrugged again. He could hear enough if he was actually focusing on it. 'Ill just turn them all the way up and hope for the best!' he said even though they both knew it was a pointless endeavor. She nodded and they continued on with eating. 'Soooo where are we going on the tour?' viv asked tally making it clear she would be tagging along for shits and giggles. What else would they do with their time. 'Everywhere really!' she said excited to show her brother and harry the training ground. It would be good fun and she was hoping to see winnie.

'Beth wants to know if she can come?' viv asked wondering how the kid would respond. She had seen her have a go at beth and beth had told her about it after viv had given her a much needed hug. Tally nodded. All her anger had subsided. She was only now slightly annoyed at herself for arguing with the woman when she was only trying to look out for her and make sure she was ok. Now her and leah were barely talking she needed the other girls. If something happened she needed them to be there to group around her if she needed them. Viv looked at her slightly surprised. She had expected that response. She had expected the girl to be annoyed still but she just seemed kind of sad that they had fought and had a look of guilt on her face. Viv texted beth that she had the ok and waited for the girl and boys to finish their food. Tally ate half of her pasta and ate the apple she had grabbed while she waited for the boys to finish. Once they were finished they put their plates in the dirty stack before saying goodbye to the girls that had sat around them while they had been eating and with viv walking over to beth, tally found comfort in the fact that harry was holding onto her hand.

Beth smiled at the girl hoping that she wasnt annoyed at her like viv had said and that they could move past their little squabble. Tally smiled back with an obvious look of guilt presumably for what had happened. It surprised beth to say the least. Beth got up and walked over to them with jen who apparently was tagging along too.