Nick and Charlie-one shots

The end⛔️4/?

Nicks pov:

———-
the day after Charlie tried to commit.

This isn't real life. It cant be. Everywhere I go I get reminded of Charlie. Why couldn't I stay In his hospital room? I'm literally the one who found him.

I FUCKING FOUND HIM AND I CANT BE WITH HIM.

My mom stayed with Jane to comfort her. Now I'm walking home.

Not to my home. To Charlie's. I need to see why. I need a reason. I did everything I could. Is this my fault?

Will he.. die because of me? Thinking about it makes me want to puke.

I get to his house and open the door. My heart is racing. Even being here makes me want to die.

I go up to his room and open it. I look around and wipe the tears off my face. Oh my god. He left letters. What the hell.

I go up to his bed and sit on it. I grab the letter titled "Nick" and start to read it.

——————

Dear nick.

Hi Nicky, this is kind of weird huh? I just want to say that none of this is your fault. You have done so much for me that i don't deserve. But I can tell your tired and annoyed of me, don't apologize for it. I would be annoyed of myself too. My mental health is just too much for everyone I can't keep torturing you all with this. When I told you I'd love you I meant it Nick, I'll love you and look after you even in the afterlife. We will see each other soon.

-your char.

—————-

What the hell? He has never been annoying to me. He's my char. He's my boyfriend. Why would he do this to me? Why would he leave me alone?

Why would he think I'm tired of him? He's the love of my life.

I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I have to live my life without-.

No. He's going to survive. He'll make it.

He's going to wake up and spring up and hug me like he always does, he will blush at a remark I make about him and his cheeks will turn a cute pink color. He can't leave me. No way.

—————-

Present day (nick stays with Charlie for a week.)

I stare at Charlie as he lowly snores, God he's beautiful, I just don't understand how an amazing person like him wouldn't want to exist. Well I guess I do know. He thinks I don't know why he tried to commit even though I do. I think knowing that gives him peace though so i won't tell him unless he asks.

"Mmm" he moves closer to me while slowly opening his eyes.

"Morning sleepy bird." He smiles and I kiss his forehead.

"We're you watching me sleep?" He giggles and looks up at me.

"Mmm maybe?..." i kiss him on his lips and he gets up to brush his teeth.

"Last day of bed rest, you happy?" I ask him when he comes back.

He nods slightly and gets back in bed with me.

I really need to talk to him about this, it won't get better if we don't. Plus it's a huge topic. I'll ask him later though. His family are going to their grandmas at night so I'll ask him then.

"Hungry?" I play with his hair, he shakes his head and I sigh. It's no surprise his ed is worse, but he's doing virtual sessions with Geoff 2x a week, so hopefully he is getting all the help he needs.

—————

"Alright kids, if you need anything let us know ok, we will be 20 minutes away." We both nod and hug them goodbye. This was the first time the house was empty with only me and Charlie in here. We go back to his room and snuggle on the bed.

The rain pattering on the roof and our breathing is the only thing we can hear. I'll ask him now, I just hope he doesn't get upset.

"Charlie, can I ask you something?" I feel him tense up and let a shaky breath, he sits up and I also sit up with him.

He nods.

"Char, why didn't you tell me you wanted to-" I don't finish the sentence, the rain outside gets louder.

He looks down at his hands and fiddles with it.

"I'm a burden Nick. We both know that but you just don't say it, I thought I was doing you all a favor. Because dealing with a mentally ill person is tiring, it would be better if you didn't have to." His voice breaks multiple times and hearing this makes me cry. He looks up at me with tears running down his face and wipes mine away.

"You are not a burden my love. I would never say that because it isn't true, Charlie you need to understand how important you are to me. I couldn't live without you. And the letters-" I stop talking but realize too late.

"Wait, you read the letters?" I slowly nod my head.

He hugs me and starts crying.

"I'm-so-sorry. Oh god.." I close my eyes, trying to stop the tears form running down my face.

"It's okay love, it's all going to be okay." I rub his back and lay us both down, we cuddle until he and I stop crying. My heart broke hearing him talk about how hard it was, I wish I could've helped.

But he's alive. That's all that matters.

————

940 words

Thank you for all the support. Love all of you guys!  -m💕