Flirty Business

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Five Hargreeves x Fem!reader

Warnings: none


It was a typical Sunday morning at the Umbrella Academy mansion, and the Hargreeves siblings were scattered around the living room, each engaged in their own activities

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It was a typical Sunday morning at the Umbrella Academy mansion, and the Hargreeves siblings were scattered around the living room, each engaged in their own activities. Luther was lifting weights, Diego was cleaning his knives, Klaus was draped over the couch, Viktor was reading a book, and Allison was scrolling through her phone.

In the middle of it all, Five and Y/n sat on the loveseat, utterly absorbed in each other.

"Hey, Five," Y/n said, her voice low and playful as she traced her finger along his collar. "Did I ever tell you that you look incredibly sexy when you're planning how to save the world?"

Five smirked, his eyes twinkling. "Well, Y/n, did I ever tell you that you make the best coffee in the universe? It's the only thing keeping me sane."

Diego, who was closest to the couple, groaned loudly. "Oh, come on! Can you two stop with the mushy stuff? We're right here!"

Luther set down his weights, his brow furrowing. "Yeah, seriously. Get a room or something."

Y/n giggled, leaning in closer to Five. "But why would we do that when we can enjoy each other's company right here?" She planted a kiss on Five's cheek, making a loud mwah sound.

Five grinned, turning his head to return the kiss. "Exactly. Plus, I love seeing them squirm."

Klaus, who had been quietly observing with an amused expression, finally burst out laughing. "Oh, you two are priceless! Keep it up; I'm loving this show!"

Later that day, the Hargreeves siblings gathered in the kitchen for lunch. Y/n was bustling around, preparing sandwiches, while Five leaned against the counter, watching her with a smitten look.

"You know, Y/n," Five said, his voice carrying a teasing lilt, "you're really amazing. Who knew someone could make a sandwich look so good?"

Y/n blushed, her eyes sparkling as she glanced over at him. "Flattery will get you everywhere, Five. Do you want extra cheese on yours?"

"Always," Five replied, his gaze lingering on her.

Allison, sitting at the kitchen table, rolled her eyes. "Really, guys? Sandwiches now? Is there anything you two won't flirt over?"

Five shrugged nonchalantly. "Nope."

Y/n handed Five his sandwich, her fingers brushing his in a deliberate move. "I can't help it if he brings out the best in me," she said sweetly.

Diego, chewing on his own sandwich, looked like he might choke. "Ugh, please! I'm trying to eat here!"

A little while later, Five and Y/n were walking down the hallway, deep in conversation. Five had his arm casually draped around Y/n's shoulders, and they were laughing about something.

"You know," Five said, stopping to lean against the wall and pull Y/n closer, "if you keep laughing like that, I might fall for you all over again."

Y/n's eyes gleamed with mischief. "Only if you promise to catch me."

As they leaned in for a kiss, Viktor, who had just come around the corner, sighed dramatically. "You guys, again? How do you not get tired of this?"

Five and Y/n looked at each other, then back at Viktor, and shrugged in unison. "Why get tired of a good thing?" Five said, smirking.

By the evening, the siblings had gathered in the living room for movie night. Five and Y/n, predictably, were cuddled up on the couch, whispering sweet nothings and giggling softly.

Klaus, sprawled out on the floor with a bowl of popcorn, couldn't resist. "Okay, okay, I've had enough. We need to set some ground rules. No more flirting during movie night. It's distracting!"

Y/n snuggled closer to Five, a playful grin on her lips. "But Klaus, how else are we supposed to entertain ourselves during the boring parts?"

Five kissed the top of Y/n's head. "Don't worry, Klaus. We'll try to keep it down. Just for you."

Allison threw a pillow at them, laughing. "You guys are impossible!"

Luther, trying to focus on the screen, grumbled, "Seriously, do you guys ever stop?"

Diego, shaking his head in disbelief, added, "I've seen less PDA in rom-coms."

When the movie finally ended, Five and Y/n were still wrapped up in each other, much to the ongoing annoyance and amusement of the others.

As everyone was getting ready to head to bed, Five stood up, stretching. "Well, it's been a great day. I'm going to get some rest. Y/n, care to join me?"

Y/n stood up, linking her arm through Five's. "I thought you'd never ask."

Klaus watched them leave, shaking his head with a chuckle. "You know, as annoying as they are, I gotta admit—they're kind of cute."

Diego groaned. "Yeah, sure, whatever. Just don't let them hear you say that."

Allison smiled, leaning back in her chair. "They're happy. I guess that's what matters."

As Five and Y/n reached their room, Five turned to her, his expression softening. "Thank you for helping me to annoy my siblings"

Y/n smiled, brushing a lock of hair away from his face. "It was fun. And besides, I think we got to them. They're all talking about us now."

Five laughed, pulling her into a gentle embrace. "Mission accomplished then?"

"Definitely," Y/n replied, leaning in for a kiss. "But next time, maybe we should give them a break. Just a little one."

"Agreed," Five said, smiling against her lips. "For now, anyway."

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