Number Five Imagines

Flirting Flops and Jealousy Jokes

Five Hargreeves x Fem!reader

Warnings: none

Five Hargreeves and his wife, Y/n, had a playful and competitive relationship, always trying to outdo each other in various games and pranks. One afternoon, Five, feeling a bit mischievous, decided to test the waters of jealousy. His plan? Flirt with another woman and see how Y/n would react.

"I'll be the perfect gentleman," Five muttered to himself, adjusting his collar as he glanced at his reflection in the mirror. "Just enough to make her a little jealous."

They were at a café with some friends, including Klaus, who was already sipping a fancy cocktail and eyeing the other patrons with a knowing smirk. Five scanned the crowd and spotted a woman sitting alone at the bar, engrossed in a book. She seemed like a safe target for his little experiment.

With a casual stride, Five approached the woman at the bar. He flashed a charming smile and said, "Hello there. You look like you're enjoying your book."

The woman glanced up, clearly taken by surprise. "Oh, hi. Yes, it's really interesting."

"Mind if I join you?" Five asked, leaning against the bar with what he hoped was a suave demeanor.

The woman seemed slightly flustered but nodded. "Sure, I guess."

Five launched into a series of light compliments and small talk, keeping an eye on Y/n from the corner of his vision. She was chatting with Klaus but noticed Five's new friend almost immediately. Her eyes narrowed slightly, and she excused herself from Klaus, making a beeline for the bar.

Y/n, trying to keep her composure, sauntered over to Five and the woman. She slid her arm around Five's waist, plastering a sweet smile on her face. "Hey, darling. Who's your new friend?"

Five, inwardly thrilled that his plan was working, kept his tone nonchalant. "Oh, this is, uh..." He turned to the woman, suddenly realizing he hadn't gotten her name.

"Linda," the woman supplied, looking slightly uncomfortable now.

"Yes, Linda," Five said, trying to regain his composure. "We were just discussing books."

"Books, huh?" Y/n said, her smile tightening. "Well, Linda, Five here has the most interesting taste in literature. Isn't that right, honey?"

Five, sensing the tension in Y/n's voice, tried to smooth things over. "Absolutely. Linda, have you ever read about quantum physics?"

Linda's eyes widened. "Um, no, not really. I should get going. Nice meeting you both."

As Linda hurried away, Five turned to face Y/n, a triumphant grin spreading across his face. "Someone jealous, are we?"

Y/n folded her arms, giving him a look that could melt steel. "Jealous? More like annoyed that my husband is trying to flirt with other women."

Five chuckled, pulling Y/n close. "It was just a little experiment. I wanted to see how you'd react."

Y/n rolled her eyes but couldn't suppress a smile. "Well, congratulations, you got a reaction. And now, you're going to have to make it up to me."

"Anything for you, my love," Five said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "What's your price?"

"Let's see," Y/n pretended to ponder, tapping her chin. "How about you make me dinner tonight? And no takeout. I want the real deal."

Five groaned playfully. "Fine, but don't blame me if the kitchen ends up in flames."

Klaus, who had been watching the whole scene unfold from his spot at the table, burst into laughter. "You two are hilarious. Five, you're lucky she didn't dump that cocktail over your head."

Y/n laughed, poking Five in the ribs. "That's because I love him too much to waste a good drink."

Five grinned, wrapping his arm around Y/n's shoulders as they walked back to join their friends. "And that, my dear, is why you're the best wife in all the timelines."

That evening, Five attempted to make a fancy dinner for Y/n, as promised. Despite his best efforts, the kitchen soon resembled a war zone, with flour and sauce splattered everywhere and smoke rising from the oven.

Y/n, sitting at the counter with a glass of wine, watched the chaos with a mix of amusement and affection. "You know, you're actually kind of cute when you're trying so hard."

Five, waving a dish towel at the smoke detector, turned to her with an exasperated smile. "Remind me never to make you jealous again. This is way too much work."

Y/n laughed, taking another sip of her wine. "Agreed. But it's the thought that counts."

Finally, after much trial and error, Five managed to present a somewhat passable meal. They sat down at the table, clinking their glasses together.

"To experiments that backfire," Y/n toasted, her eyes sparkling with laughter.

"And to the most patient and forgiving wife," Five added, his gaze full of love.

And as they enjoyed their meal, Five realized that no other woman is as wonderful as his.