Clouded Hearts

42: Once

Astraea

At some point, I want to remember Achelois. What was she like when we first met? Was she kind as always? Or a grumpy one like her to her friends? What was it felt like seeing her for the first time?

Did my heart jumped or flattered when I saw her eyes? Because it did, back in that window.

Did she approach me? Or did I?

I have tons of questions. Questions that I knew, she can answer. But I don't wanna be insensitive. I don't want to hurt her.

Seeing her right now, talking with Melli. Smiling, laughing and enjoying their conversation. I think that's enough, she deserves it.

I don't understand by what her lolo said that she earned everything she have right now. All I know is she work hard for this, for me.

I felt guilty. I felt like I'm a stranger she always cared for. Or...do I saw her as a stranger who got close to me all of a sudden.

I sipped at the wine before averting my gaze at them.

I want to remember her but my mind won't cooperate. I remember few but it's all blurred, unclear.

I saw her walking towards me. I prepared myself to encounter her presence.

"Hey." She greeted. I just nod, acknowledging her presence.

"What's on your mind?" She asked, pouring herself a drink.

"Nothing. Just..." I hesitated

"Just what?" She looked at me.

"What was it like..." Kumunot ang noo niya.

"Huh?" Napakamot tuloy ako sa ulo ko.

"Our first interaction." I said, straight to the point. That caught her off guard.

"Why?" She asked after her silence.

"I was just curious. There's a part of me that wants to remember... you... us." I saw her gulped and her eyes darkened a little.

"The past is no longer worth anything. It is already done. It's finished." She replied.

"I know, but is it a sin to be curious?"

"Curiosity kills the cat." She said before drinking.

"I'm not a cat." She looked at me in disbelief. I smiled awkwardly. I am not a cat, really. She heaved a sigh, accepting her defeat.

"Fine. It's awkward though. I mean, you approach me first. You manage to caught my attention. As I remembered, I remind myself that I shouldn't engage in any person or situation in that province. But you are different so I thought I'd give it a try. Why not? You are adorable back then." She looked away, probably reminiscing that moment.

"How did I approach you?"

"You came to me and ask me if I want to be friends with you. Despite of my dark face that night, you still came to me and asked that." She chuckled.

"You said your friends wants to be friends with me. That's the start of me hanging out with you and your friends." She continued.

"Eryx and Ice." I said

"and Gael." She added. "You guys are unbreakable back in those days. I remember when I first saw you, you're with them. You guys are laughing while walking."

"That's probably the time when Gael and Eryx were still okay." She nodded.

"They're like brothers, inseparable." She said. It's sad to think that they now look at each other with anger and disgust, who would've thought that they were once brothers to each other.