"Hypothetically, of course. Are there some things better left unsaid? Or would you wanna know instead? Hypothetically, of course. Are there some wars not worth fightin'? Some tears not worth cryin'?" - Lyfe Jennings
REIGN
"See, now you try." Montana says, taking his blindfold off. We're sitting on his porch. He's teaching me how to take a gun apart and put it back together without looking as fast as I can. KeKe dropped me off here along with my brothers and I'm so glad. I wasn't in the mood to see my dad after what he said before I went to school. It hurt my feelings but I'm a strong girl. I'm not about to let his words destroy me.
"Montana, I'm no good at this. Can you teach me how to do something else? Oh, I heard you know about human bodies and stuff. Is that true?" I ask, counting his bullets. "It is very true. When I was in school, I likes physiology and human anatomy a lot. The rest of my knowledge came from reading and experience." he answers. "Oh. What kind of experience?" I ask. He chuckles, then directs his attention to Noble, Majesty, uncle Darius, Tae, and some guys from Montana's neighborhood as they play basketball in his driveway.
"I don't really have a good answer, honestly." he says. I smile. "Tell me. I tell you a lot of secrets. Why can't you tell me about your experience?" I ask. He leans back. "Well, I was doing hits for money for a long time and I'd do crazy shit sometimes. Every once in a while I'd tie one of my victims up and study certain things. I learned a lot. They were gonna die anyway, so I'd experiment on them." he says.
"Are you still a hit man?" I ask. I'm so amazed right now and I probably shouldn't be. "Well... I try not to kill nobody but every once in a while I get the urge and I merk a few niggas. I got more than enough money and I'm comfortable. I'm not really trying to do hits. I enjoyed them though." he answers. "Next time you do a hit, can I come? I've never seen anybody die." I say. "Naw, baby girl. I wouldn't purposely allow your momma to see my lifestyle so I'm not gone let you see it neither." he says.
I sigh. "How long have you known my mom?" I ask. "She was pregnant with your brothers when we met, so almost seventeen years." he answers. "How come yall broke up?" I ask. "Why you asking me so many questions?" he jokingly asks. I laugh then hug him. "Cause you're my second daddy and I can talk to you about everything so tell me." I say.
He laughs. "Whatever, Reign. But we broke up cause I wanted the best for her." he says. "I was six but I remember little things. I remember her crying and begging." I say, thinking back on it. I was so worried. I'll remember the way she cried until the day I die. She was so hurt.
"I wasn't trying to hurt her. At the time, I thought your dad could love her better than I could. I thought putting my feelings aside and giving her up would be the best for her." he says. "I think you were wrong." I mumble. He doesn't say anything. He's just staring at me. "Yeah, me too." he admits.
"Have you had a girlfriend since then?" I ask him. He starts laughing. "Damn, Reign, I feel like I'm being interviewed. But no, I haven't. I don't want one. Before I met her, I had an ex but my feelings for her were not strong and I was just with her for the hell of it. Yo momma was my first and only real love. I never loved nobody like that before." he says, smiling a little. I gasp. He looks at me crazy. "What?" he asks. "That's the first time I ever saw you blush." I say. "You so fucking over dramatic." he says, laughing hard.
I smile. My eyes drift off to my brothers and my uncle as they play basketball. I sit up a little, staring at one of the boys from around here. I've seen him plenty of times. He's one of Noble and Majesty's friends. He's so fine but I know he's probably way older than me. I don't even know his name. Every time my brothers have friends over, my mom and dad make me stay with them because they don't want me talking to boys yet.
