Dread Beard put the kettle on the open fire and then attached his long fork hand attachment.
“Why are you doing that?” asked Chop.
“You want crumpets don’t you?” replied Dread Beard.
Chop looked above the fire at Dread beard’s collection of hand attachments. “What are they all used for?” he inquired.
“That one’s my cappuccino attachment, it’s got a battery in the stem to whip the milk up.” He then pointed to the scissors, “I can use them like Edward Scissorhands, won prizes for my topiary, I ‘ave. Then there’s the bear claw like Han from enter the Dragon.”
“Are you as good as him at Shaolin Kung Fu?” asked Wobble.
“No but I can kill a carrot from 2 paces with my beard.”
“Didn’t you just do that joke?”
“Aww, well then, something else witty erm… I can Wing Chung with the best of ‘um.” He then looked back at the wall, “The spike is for when I’m doing my accounts, and the sword is for when I’m pirating with me old mates on the Blue Banana.”
“What’s the hand for?” asked Wibble.
“That’s from the science fiction dimension and the batteries are wearing down so I don’t use it much only when I fight with a light sabre.”
YOU ARE READING
The Goblin Adventures
FantasyWe meet Ugbash, Pan Head, Wibble, Wobble, Chop and Idunno from The Crying Pennant in a short serialised story where they go hunting for squink. Then we meet Bip, Bop, Battam, Ugz, Bugz and Tongs the Goblin Space Marines who along with Sergeant Griml...
