“Can you empty you pockets please Mr. Ginster?”
“I've got my rights you know.”
“You may have, but at the minute you are under arrest and in my charge and need to empty your pockets.”
D’ark Goblin started to empty his pockets. There was a bag of marbles, a batarang, a piece of green cheese, a can of CS spray, a spare domino mask, some mouth freshener (for the lady goblins), a camera phone, lots of money in $100 bills and jelly babies in case he went time travelling in a blue police box.
“Why have you got your marbles in a bag?”
“So I don't lose them.”
“Have you been accused of losing your marbles before?”
“When I was bullied as a kid.”
“Are you trying to say you were psychologically affected as a kid because of bullying and that is why you are a criminal now?”
“I wasn’t but I will do if it’s a good defence.”
“Why do you have CS spray?”
“To defend myself against criminals.”
“Why do you need that? You are in the Evil League. Surely it is not them you are afraid of?”
“No, it’s muggers. If I lose my super powers in an unsavoury place then I can get beaten up and robbed, so I take a can of pepper spray with me.”
“I thought you were good at martial arts?”
“When you lose your powers you feel weak and wobbly. As evidenced by my performance just now.”
The officer put the D’ark Goblin’s items into an envelope.
“Those jelly babies will go off if I’m in here too long,” said the Goblin, “Can I eat them now?"
“Oh go on then, seeing as there’s only two of them. How do you eat them?”
“What do you mean?”
“Heads first or feet first?”
“I swallow them whole like this,” he said as he gulped them both down. “Why do you ask?”
“Heads are for extroverts, tails are for introverts.”
“What’s the whole thing mean?”
“You’re a monster?”
“With super powers,” said the D’ark goblin as grabbed his personal items, barged the policeman out of the way and broke through the door.
“How did you get your powers back?” asked the confused officer.
“The Jelly Babies were hardened super power potions, specially mixed by the Mixer.” The Goblin ran through the door and flew back to the embassy.
“That was a bit of bad luck,” said the sergeant to the officer.
“A bit of a mix up by the mixer made that trickster mix me up.”
YOU ARE READING
The Goblin Adventures
FantasyWe meet Ugbash, Pan Head, Wibble, Wobble, Chop and Idunno from The Crying Pennant in a short serialised story where they go hunting for squink. Then we meet Bip, Bop, Battam, Ugz, Bugz and Tongs the Goblin Space Marines who along with Sergeant Griml...
