Barely Breathing//Ethis

12||

Chris' point of view:

I wake up and instantly smile noticing that Ethan had snuggled into my chest and is now sleeping soundly still with his arm wrapped loosely around my waist. His hair is messy and parts have fallen onto his face, but I can still see his lips that are slightly parted as his chest rises and falls. It makes me have a sudden urge to kiss him but I know I shouldn't, he didn't react well after our kiss yesterday. I'm still confused about that, he kissed me and then he was the one to run away afterwards.

He begins to stir slowly and he sits up as his eyes flutter open, he looks confused at first but then his eyes grow wide as he remembers everything that happened yesterday and he edges away almost as if he's scared.

"Ethan," I start softly not wanting to scare him any further "we need to talk about us" he nods but says nothing so I continue

"What was that yesterday?" I ask wanting to know where we are going to go from here

"Uh well I don't know, it was- it was a split second decision I guess" he says nervously avoiding my question

"Ethan, are you," I pause trying to think of the right way to word it "are you gay?"

He looks even more scared now as if that one word could destroy him instantly, he swallows a lump in his throat before nodding slowly as he covers his face starting to cry lightly

"Hey, hey don't cry it's completely fine" I say trying to calm him, I hesitantly move closer to him so I can wrap my arms around him pulling him into a hug. He slowly wraps his arms around me and cries into my shoulder, soaking my shirt.

"Everything will be okay, you've got me. Ethan I think I'm gay too" I confess feeling a massive weight being lifted off my shoulders, in hearing this it only makes Ethan grip onto me tighter as if he is scared that if he let go he'd lose me.

"Please, please don't cry." I plead with him

"I've never told anyone Chris, I'm gay" he sobs finally voicing his thoughts

"I know it's scary but I also know that you're a strong person" I tell him honestly, he shakes his head against my chest in protest. I sigh resting my head on his shoulder as I rub small circles on his back, this is comforting for the both of us. He eventually untangles himself from me as he wipes his eyes laughing at himself, sniffling he looks down as he plays with his hands

"I've known for a long time, I kept denying it. I couldn't be gay, I don't want to be gay" he mumbles, I put a finger under his chin bringing his head back up until his eyes finally meet mine

"Ethan your sexuality doesn't define who you are as a person, you're still amazing, you're still funny, you're still you." I tell him and a small smile finds its way to his face

"Thank you," he says "it's just hard because I'm the brave one and no one ever asks the brave one if they're okay" it's true. No one ever asks him if he's okay, if he's coping.

"Are you okay?" I ask shifting my position so I can be a little bit more comfortable

"Not really" he says biting his lip

"What's wrong?" I ask hoping he'll tell me

"Promise you won't freak out?" He asks, I nod.

Oh god, what's he going to tell me?

"While you were in hospital I broke up with my girlfriend, because I love you and she started a bunch of rumours and crap about me and now I'm getting so much hate" he says scratching the back of his neck

"Wait you love me?" I ask thinking I didn't hear him right.

"Yeah, I do" he says looking down blushing

Ethan's point of view:

I want him to say he loves me too but I know he won't, he isn't even sure that he's gay. If I'm honest I'm scared, I'm so scared. I told him I was gay and that I loved him.

He wouldn't say it back, no one ever has.

A/N: OKAY SO I ACCIDENTALLY UPDATE LIKE 5 MINUTES AGO BUT I WASNT DONE AND NOW I AM SO