Barely Breathing//Ethis

46||

Chris' point of view:

"Ethan?" I call into his room, I hear movement from within his ensuite and I walk in seeing him leaning up on the basin.

"Ah fuck" he exhales in pain taking in deep breathes

"Stay right there I'm getting you more painkillers" I tell him going to exit but when he speaks I stop

"No! I-I know what they do to me," he says shaking his head urgently but his breathing is heavier, indicating the pain is getting worse "I threw them up, Chris please. I don't need any I'll be fine, just help me back to my bed. I just need to sit down, I'm okay" I nod, knowing that there is no use in arguing. I let him put an arm around me for support and we slowly make it back to his bed, he sighs in relief as soon as he's sitting so I join him.

"Whatever I said wasn't true" he says calmly but he's not looking at me

"You told me about the finale" I say softly

His eyes flicker with recognition and that's when I know he's lying.

"What about the finale?" He asks, but he's still not looking at me and his voice is flat

"You know."

"I-I-I-um-" he stutters trying to think of something to say

"Ethan it's okay" I say softly, his shoulders drop in defeat and he nods swallowing a lump in his throat.

"I can't believe I told you" he sighs

"I can't believe you felt like you couldn't"

I wrap my arms around him being careful not to hurt him and he rests his head on my shoulder.

"I was so careless, I could have avoided it," he whispers and the fact he's whispering lets me know he's trying hard not to cry "I was listening to music on my phone and I bumped into him, I swear I could've started crying right then but I refused to let him see me cry again. I said sorry and tried to walk as quickly as possible away but he grabbed my arm and- and he said he would make me sorry, that's when I screamed. He covered my mouth with one hand and put the other down my pants as slowly as he could. I tried to get away but that only made him hurt me more. He didn't care that he was hurting me either. He started pulling me towards the supply closet and that's when I got away." He says as quickly as he can, I know that it's just because he doesn't want to cry, he's knows he can cry with me, I'm here for him.

"It's going to be okay," I say quietly "you're so brave, I'm proud of you for telling me."

"If I'm so brave then why am I having panic attacks almost every time I leave the house?" he mumbles gripping onto my shirt that little bit tighter

"That's what makes you brave, despite that, you still do. I love you and I'm here for you, okay?" I tell him confidently

"Okay, Chris?" He says quietly

"Yeah?"

"Thank you so much" he looks up at me now

"You don't have to thank me you know," I smile laughing through my nose "my parents want us to go over to my house as soon as possible" I tell him, changing the subject.

"I can't exactly go looking like this, can I?" He says referring to the bruises that still haven't faded, that's not the problem we need to focus on right now though.

"Ethan, I told them about what Jeremy did" I rush

"Oh." Is all he says looking down again

"They want to talk to you about it, to help. I had to tell them Ethan, they can actually do something about it" I say quickly trying to convince him that I'm only doing this because it's what's best for him.

"What if they think I'm lying?" He asks sounding scared

"They believe me, so why would they treat you any different?" I shoot back

"I guess you're right"

"What was that?" I smirk

"Shut up, you know what I said" he laughs pushing me lightly

"Whatever." I reply still smiling as I stand up going to leave

He grabs my hand not letting go even when I try to pull away

"Ethan" I groan

"Chris," he mimics "don't go" he pouts giving me puppy dog eyes

"I need to sleep" I explain, despite him barely even trying to hold my hand and keep me from going, he's quite strong.

"Is this not a bed?" He raises an eyebrow

"Well, yeah, but I meant my bed" I sigh smiling at him with a lopsided smile

"I see no difference" he replies with a smirk growing on his face I sigh, knowing I can't give in to that cute look of his. The air temperature has risen quite a bit since I put on my long sleeved shirt this morning, so I pull it off. I try not to blush when I catch Ethan staring as I climb into bed next to him. I'm a little confused because when I try to get close to him, he moves a little bit away. At first I thought he might just be getting comfortable, so I move closer again. Then he turns over. Is he just being moody or something? I press myself up against his back and he moves away again. I'm about to say something when I hear a laugh.

"What are you trying to do, Bub?" I ask, earning a small moan I've never heard Ethan make before. It was a mixture of pain and a laugh and something else I'm not sure of.

"Nothing, just go to sleep." He tells me.

I don't. I pull myself over him so my chest is resting in his side. I try to look at his face but he burries it into the pillow. Then I tickle him. I tickle him until he rolls over to face me, me ending up on top of him. His left leg is sort of bent and resting over his right and it's hard to lay on that, so I push it back. Then my thigh hits something- or rather, feels- different. I immediately know what he was trying to hide. Ethan swallows and his eyes flicker past me, obviously embarrassed.

"Someone's a little turned on." I whisper, not sure exactly what to do. I'm taken aback when he reaches up and kisses me. Partly because I wasn't expecting it and partly because I didn't expect the kiss to be this deep. As soon as I kiss back, Ethan's hand reaches behind my neck, and pulls me closer to him. We continue to make out, the kisses getting heavier and heavier. He moves his kisses down to my neck, leaving a trail of burning hickeys as he goes. I bring him into a kneeling position and slide his shirt over his head. His hands work their way down from my neck, to my collarbone and down my stomach. My old scars are on there and he moves slower along those. Suddenly, he begins to push me backwards. I'm now laying on my back on the bed and Ethan's kisses are moving from my neck, down my body. He pays extra attention to my scars, kissing them twice as much. I sit up, not sure how much more of this I can take. I slam my lips back into his and push him back into our original position. My hands linger around the elastic of his shorts, not sure whether I should or not. I decide to try. I place my thumb on the bottom of his v-line and slide my other four fingers below the waistline. Ethan let's out a small moan and slides his tongue across my bottom lip again. I let him in. I slide my hand down the side of his shorts as he slides his tongue into my mouth. My hand is resting on his thigh and is moving closer. I just touch him through his underwear, grip his bulge lightly in my hand when he stops. I quickly pull my hand out of his sorts and pull away from him, using this time to catch my breath and he does the same.