Oh how I wish I could go back in time and fix my suffering,
you who does not understand what you feel--
it's ok to feel that way.
Hating yourself, my sweet, is not healthy,
and a small part of a large illness you have.
No, do not be scared of that word
because it's ok to not be ok.
You have depression, you see, but it is not so blatant;
it is a sly creature with many forms, some so subtle you don't even realize.
Ah, but that is not all--
oh no.
You know how unbelievably nervous you get?
About almost everything?
That panic?
That is anxiety, little one, something many people have.
It is irrational and not well understood by the mentally healthy--
so do not fret because you think you're weird or bad for feeling that way.
Large crowds and loud noises make you extremely uncomfortable--
I know this too well--
and that, my dear, is also fine because you are introverted.
Yes, it is ok to not want to be in that environment, no matter what people say.
Just because you are not as fast at certain things--
like all the other kids--
that does not mean you are stupid, precious child.
It's ok to have different gifts.
Your father yells at you frequently, and though he loves you,
you have every right to feel the way you do.
Your feelings are valid,
so do not belittle yourself for what you feel.
You are a unique kid with many talents--
explore them!
It's ok to make mistakes
for no one is perfect at something from the beginning.
Try something new,
you will thank me later.
Your worth is not determined by who finds you attractive.
no matter what you think of yourself, sweet child,
there is always someone who loves you for who you are--
yes, all of you, flaws included.
(Hard to believe, I know)
Dear Past Me, don't be so hard on yourself because it won't matter later.
~ ~ ~
Author's Note: If you could write and send a letter/poem to your past self, what would it say? Leave me a comment and let me know!
YOU ARE READING
Monsters Inside My Head
PoetryWARNING: Some pieces may contain triggers for those who struggle with any form of depression or self harm. Please read with caution. I will often rearrange the chapters in the way I see fit, so please be patient and keep that in mind. This is my fir...
