The Unbelievable Life of Lynn Carmina

Chapter 33: Mark's True Colors

Sorry for the long wait. Hope you enjoy this look at Mark's true colors...

Who likes the new cover? Made it myself :D Don't forget to comment & vote!

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Recap chap 32:

Just as I hung up the phone, it vibrated in my hand. I hesitated to look at it because I knew who it was from. I took a deep breath and read the message with so much apprehension and anxiety that my hands were shaking.

 * get your ass home now, or you won't have a home to come back to whore * Once I let those words sink in, I closed my eyes and let out the breath I'd been holding.

 I just fucked up my family and there was no way in hell that I could explain this. I knew that Mark wasn’t going to let this one slide. It was going to go badly and might end up in a physical confrontation, if I didn’t figure out some very extravagant excuse really quickly. I hadn't realized my hands were trembling so badly until Julien placed his hands on mine to steady them. I didn't look at him because I knew he was worried and would be angry if he knew what was waiting for me at home.

 "Jules I have to go home... now." Those were the only words my lifeless voice uttered. I was about to walk into the ruins of my life, my death of sorts, but at least I had seen it coming.

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Chapter 33: Mark’s True Colors

I was incredibly nervous and holding back tears with all the strength I had in me as we pulled up outside Starbucks to retrieve my car. I didn't want Jules to worry about me and I didn't want him to know I feared going home. I was crying relentlessly in my head, so as not to let it show on the outside.

I bolted out of the car and hastily made my way to mine as tears began to break lose. Jules stopped me short, grabbing my hand and pulling me to him. He cradled me protectively in his arms and looked at me with sad eyes. It was almost as if he knew what I was thinking, what I was feeling without me having to say it.

"Lynny..." He said in the smooth and sexy voice I adored.

"Are you okay? I don't like to see my girl upset; don’t think you can hide it from me. I’m sure everything will be fine, but I'm a bit worried about you." Jules finished with concern so laden in his big brown eyes that it was almost painful. He held my face in his hands and stared at me, searching for answers he should have known he wasn't going to get.

Should I tell him I feared that Mark had probably figured things out and was going to take my kids? Should I explain that I would be left with nothing, just like always and that would devastate me? Should I tell him that if Mark was as pissed as I assumed he was, that I was afraid he was going to get physical with me?

No. I couldn't tell Jules any of this for three reasons. First, if I did, he would feel guilty and guilt was the mother of all evil. I didn't need him feeling guilty about a choice that felt right and was solely mine to make. Second, he was so overprotective and I knew that if he knew what I faced, he wouldn't let me do it alone and I didn't want him wrapped up in my problems any more than he already was. Lastly, I knew a confrontation between him and Mark was on the horizon and that was something I couldn't let happen at any cost. I loved him and I needed him safe.

No, this was something I had to do alone. As much as I didn't want to, I knew I had to. This was between Mark and I, and it was time for me to finally be honest with my husband about everything. As scary as that seemed and as much as I feared the worst, I knew it was time to be honest and stop the lies.