Afraid

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I don't want to come off as rude
I don't want to push everyone away
But I can't help it
I'm too afraid of finding out
Who will go and who will stay
So I keep everything inside
And with a fake smile
I pretend that everything is fine,
I hide behind long sleeves
So no one will see
All the pain that hides
In my eyes
And all the tears I've cried
Behind closed doors.
I don't want anyone to leave
But at the same time
I don't want to let anyone in
I'm so afraid of letting people see
The side of me
That only a closed door sees
I'm afraid
That once anyone sees
How truly broken I am
They will all leave.

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