My Perfect Stranger

-Another Side of the Story-

"Good Morning Ms. San Roman, this is Sofia. She will orient you today here in our rehab. If you have any questions or clarifications feel free to ask me or her. Anyway, enjoy your start here in St. Louis. Mababait lahat ng staff and patient dito." Mrs. Cesar smiled at me, the chief Physical Therapist. She introduced me to Sofia Montalban, one of the staff here. I smiled limply in return then we both went out of Mrs. Cesar's office.

I felt like a walking dead. I'm so fucked up inside but of course I have to be professional. Giving in with my emotion right now is a big NO NO! This is my first day at work and I have to act like everything is okay and fuck it! It's damn hard! How could I set aside this feeling inside of me? It's eating me up. Why am I always doomed when I'm in a relationship? This issue again?! I have been cheated on twice by two different men. What the heck is so damn wrong with me!? Why do they have to do that??

"Uhmm, Ms. San Roman? Are you okay?" I quickly met her gaze and I saw concern in her eyes. I can tell that she's nice. I tried to feign a smile, I just don't know if it worked. I know we're touring around the clinic and she's discussing something but I can't understand a thing and I'm not even aware of my surrounding or if she's asking me or what.

"Can I be honest to you since I'm in charge for you today?" she said sweetly at me as she faces me. Her voice toned down a bit.

I was caught off guard. "Yeah. Sure. What is it?" I can sense that my facial reaction have change.

"I can feel you're upset. You're physically here but your soul is drifting somewhere. Is there any problem? Well, if you're not a keen observer like me, people couldn't tell that you're actually a mess today. You're good in keeping it." It didn't felt like she's raking a coal over me. It's more of a concern statement.

Oh God! I shouldn't be that obvious. I shouldn't let this crap get in my work today. Bad impression!

She suddenly waved her hands in the air, gesturing a no answer. "Hey. I'm not reprimanding you ha. I'm just...concern. Mukhang sobrang lalim kasi ng iniisip mo eh. Your aura is a bit gloomy today unlike the first time that I saw you here when you had your interview. Hmmm, let me guess. Love problem right?" I was surprised. How did she know? Is she a psychic or something?

"Lahat yata kami dito yan ang problem eh except si ma'am Rhea. May asawa na kasi kaya mas malaki ang problem niyan sa atin." She added as she whispered to my ear. Mrs. Cesar's is just across us looking at a file in the record section area.

She continued "Anna Elise, I know that this is easier said than done but you shouldn't let that control you. Whatever it is. It will pass."

"No. You don't understand. I mean, I feel so devastated today." I finally recovered from my shock and got my senses back with me. I don't know why did I easily open up my problem to her. I just felt the urge to do it even if we're not officially friends.

She smiled. "I know. I can feel you but don't let that stupid feeling overpower you. Yeah, you heard me right. Love is stupid. It makes us so stupid that it destructs us. It crushed our whole system down but ironically, we need it. We all want love. Who doesn't want it anyway? But once it gets the best of you where in you can't think right or it affects the other aspect of your life, learn to let go. Again, easier said than done but sometimes it's the best way. Yes, you love him. God knows how much you do but girl, if loving him makes you feel so worthless and it's like stabbing a knife on your heart over and over again to the point that it kills you inside. Damn! Wake up! Nitty gritty: Love shouldn't be your top priority in life. There are other important things in life that needs your whole attention and energy. First things first kumbaga like work. May love life ka nga pero putcha nagmumukha ka namang tanga or wala ka namang trabaho, anong silbi? Love alone can't keep us alive like what the song says. That song is bullshit!" I laughed softly at her outburst.