Gravity

Chapter 19

She was here. She was real. She was next to me her head on my chest...her long silky hair falling between my fingers as I ran my hand through her hair. Her breathing was soft....even....relaxed as she traced aimless circles around my chest.
Though our bodies were hot and damp with sweat she had goosebumps that would appear across her shoulders and back. Not sure if from the cool air blowing or from my touch but I myself would like to believe it was the later of the two.
"Hmmmm" I must have said aloud lost in my thoughts.

"What?" She rasped.

"I missed this.....nights like this.....with you."
She stilled her finger in place.

"Me too." She whispered softly.

Her response gave me hope. Hope that there may still be a chance of something between us. I wanted to dive in with the questions but I knew it would only scare her and throw her wall back up. This had to be handled with the upmost care.

"Thank you for coming tonight. As cheesy as it sounds I really enjoyed your company."

"You're welcome but you can stop tiptoeing around the conversation that I know you are dying to have." She chuckled a little.
Well then....I guess she could read me better than I thought causing me to smile inside.

"I honestly have no idea what you are talking about." I challenged. She quickly sat up tucking her legs beneath her Indian style the sheet barely draping across her lap leaving her chest bare.

"Why David Gandy.....are you trying to play dumb with me?" She teased.
God how I missed her being this way. I sat up back against the headboard placing my hands behind my head granting her a killer view of my body. Two could play at this game.
Giving my best crooked grin I replied "What? Me? Play dumb? Never."
Her eyes were wondering over me as she bit her lip.

"Hey sweetheart. My eyes are up here." She laughed the sweetest sound I have ever heard before slapping my chest.

"You are something else." She said as I grabbed her hand pulling her onto me. She straddled my lap placing her head on my should. I ran my hands up and down her smooth bare back making her jump when I would reach her tickle spots.

"On a serious note....what is it with you and music?" She took a heavy breath before she answered.

"It's hard to explain really. Music is....everything. It can say exactly how you are feeling in any certain time in life even when you don't know how to put it into words. It's never changing.....constant. It's always been my outlet. Time can move and go on but you can hear a single song and it can take you right back into where you've been. It's....just always been there for me. The one thing that has never judged me or left me. Why do you ask?"

"Just curious really. You know....I really didn't want to get into heavy shit or anything but over the last week...while you were gone...you were everywhere. Everywhere I looked....everything I heard...you were there."

"David I...."

"No just listen. Ever since I met you...you've always been about music and even more funny as it may sound every song I've ever heard around you always suited us and our situation. Call it fate or whatever you like but I heard something last week and it hit me hard in the gut."

"What is it?"

I rolled over to the side of my nightstand to grab my phone. It wouldn't take me long to find it on my playlist, it had been playing constantly since I heard it. Turning my Bluetooth on I pressed play as the song came to life on the speakers.
The smile on her face spoke volumes.

"Hmmmm. James Bay. I love him."

"Really? More than me?" Oh shit! I regretted it my second it slipped out of my mouth but it was too late. Her eyes were wide and her mouth opened.

"I uh...I...."

"No. Sorry. It came out of nowhere really. I don't know what I was thinking. Just listen." I leaned back against the headboard closing my eyes soaking in the lyrics to Move Together. This song had been everything to me this last week without her. The bed dipped a bit causing me to open my eyes to Joss putting on one of my button up shirts that laid on one of the chairs.

"What are you doing?" I reached over to turn the volume down a bit before getting up walking over to her. Tilting her chin up there were tears starting to fall.

"Hey. What's the matter?"

"David I'm sorry I hurt you. I never meant for this to happen..."

"It's ok Joss."

"No it not!"

"Joss I promise you. I am ok. You are ok and most importantly WE are ok. I want this to work between us and I'll do everything in my power to make it work. You just have to want this like I want this. If I realized anything last week it's that when you're not with me there is a gaping hole in my chest that aches constantly. I'm empty and lost without you Joss. Can't you see that I'm made for you?? I want you and only you. " My thumb wiped away a falling tear from her cheek as she sniffed trying to control her tears from breaking loose.

"But what about the press and..."

"I don't care about any of that. I will gladly walk away from all of this if it means I get to have you in the end. I'm in love with you Joslyn. And as scary as that is....I'm ready for it. All of it."

"You can't walk away from your job David that's just crazy!" She exclaimed flailing her arms around in the air.

"I can and I will if that's what it takes."

She stood staring at me as if challenging me but with her standing there wearing my button down was too distracting for my own good to challenge back.

"I want that too." She whispered so softly I honestly thought my mind was playing a trick on me.

"Excuse me did you just..."

"Shut up."
Quickly shutting my lips I questioned her with my stare.

"This thing....this feeling I have with you....I can't walk away from it. It keeps reeling me in. From day one David there was something there I couldn't deny it and now standing here with you I am now sure more than ever that you are who and what I want. I don't know how we will make it work but I guess what I am trying to say it that I'm willing to try. I have fallen in love with you and I'm not ready to let that go yet.."

Wow. Boom. It was like a bullet to the heart. Was I dreaming again or was this for real? She just said she loved me. My body was in overload I was unsure of how to respond. Instead I wrapped her up in my arms kissing her hard. It was my turn now to get choked up. Never in my life have I ever wanted anything more than this girl before me and now here the chance was to have and keep her and I was not about to let anyone or anything get in the way of that.....