Prison Diary

Welcome To My Reason

Month: June Day:18 Year: 2090

Time: 7:45

Dear Prison Diary,

After I chose not to go with Ms. Kristi, I could see it on the guards faces that they were surprised. They probably were expecting me to leave and never come back but they were wrong.

I was staying.

The two guards grabbed my arms and led me back down the hallway probably feeling like they did all of that for nothing. Having to deal with Violet, having to listen to Ms. Kristi and I, all for nothing.

As we walked back the fresh air and bright sunshine slowly decreased and I began to miss it engulfing my senses.

All my freedom, and I was walking away from it.

As much as I missed it I knew I would have to let it go. I would just have to wait for another day.

Whenever that day would come...

Even though I chose not to leave it warmed my heart that I could at least set Layna free. She deserved to have a proper childhood, not one set in a prison with a bunch of angry, broken woman with no hope. It wasn't a proper environment for her.

Then again neither was it outside of the prison.

Still I knew that she would be safer in Ms.Kristi's care. Better her care than mine's right?

I started to wonder if I would even get to say goodbye.

It was already passed lunch hour and showering time so I wasn't sure if I would even get to see her before she would be gone.

Some other guards were probably already on their way to Layna and Skunk's cell, ready to deliver her to Ms.Kristi.

I started to imagine her scared little face as the guards would take her away, not knowing where she was being taken to or what was going to happen. I imagine her begging the guards to tell her where she was being taken but they'd just ignore her and this would just add to her anxiety.

But I knew that the moment she would see who she was being taken to, all that anxiety would wash away. Once she would see Ms.Kristi everything would be fine. She would breakdown and run into her arms, so happy to see the only mother she'd ever had.

She wouldn't even hesitate to go with Ms.Kristi and I wouldn't even have blamed her for one second because any sane person would have chosen to be "free" in our dysfunctional society than in a prison.

Obviously I was crazy.

I chose Violet over my freedom.

It deeply saddened me to know that I wouldn't be seeing Layna around the prison anymore but it also made me sigh with relief.

It was for the best.

She would be safe.

Safe from those guards.

Safe from my father.

And even though it pained me to say it...

"Safe from me." I whispered sadly to myself with my head hung down as the guards continued to grip my arms and lead me all the way back to me cell.

My cell, that was not empty.

Sooner or later after what felt like hours of walking, me and the guards finally arrived at my prison cell and I was grateful because I figured that if I saw Violet, if I looked into her eyes, I would truly understand my decision.

I know I said that I was going to stick by her no matter what but come on people, this was my life for gods sake!

Did I really want to spend another day locked up in prison, knowing that I had an opportunity to be free, just so I could help a girl who I wasn't even sure was worth it?!