the book of fluff (that usually isn't)

the christmas sing-along

so i really really like this song and there's a line ("are you feeling kind of down, got that lonely christmas blues?") that i wanted to base a one-shot off of so that's what this is

((also sorry, claire, i couldn't figure out how to do your beginning))

(((side note i'm listening to the christmas sing-along right now and trying very hard not to sing along so they're done their job)))

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minor trigger warning, mentions of suicide

*christmas eve*

Scott kept his head down and his hood up to hide his tears, his hands buried in his jacket pockets. His breathing was labored as he struggled to hold back his sobs, as he was in public and hated attention.

In case you're wondering why our baby is upset, allow me to explain.

Scott was coming from his boyfriend's house. Well, his ex boyfriend. The jerk had broke it off with Scott just after he confessed how he'd fallen in love with him. Right before Christmas, too.

Suddenly, he ran into something solid. He glanced up and murmured a soft, "Sorry," before he slowly continued on his way, turning his head to hide the tears as they fell faster. You're such a mess-up. You can't do anything right, can you? He bit his lip hard to hold back a sob, reaching a hand up to quickly wipe his tears.

The boy Scott had run into regained his balance quickly and rushed after Scott, reaching out to grab his wrist. "Hey, wait. Are you crying?" he asked, concern lacing his words, but Scott just shook his head and pulled his arm free so he could keep walking. The boy sighed and caught his arm again. "Yes, you are. What's wrong?"

"Leave me alone." Scott sniffled and pulled away again, turning away to hide his tears and walking faster. The boy sighed again, letting him, but set off after him. He didn't trust Scott.

He was right not to. Scott was headed towards the bridge.

Scott climbed over to the other side without hesitation and was just about to let go when the boy finally caught up to him, grabbing his wrist. "Don't do it," he said immediately. Scott barely looked at him, yanking his wrist free and taking a step closer to the edge. "Please," the boy said, panic seeping into his voice. "I don't know what happened, but whatever it was, it's not worth taking your life over."

"Yes, it is," Scott murmured miserably, wiping his tears. "He doesn't love me." The boy stepped closer, encouraged when Scott didn't take another step. "Then he isn't worth it." Scott shook his head, accidentally letting a small sob escape his lips. "Yes, he is. He was mine and I was his but he didn't love me and I did, I do, and now he's not mine anymore." The last word was a sob, and it broke the boy's heart. "He's not worth it," he repeated gently, hesitantly reaching through the rail to take Scott's hand again. When Scott didn't pull away, he tried to carefully tug him back to safety, but Scott shook his head and pulled away again. He took a step closer to the edge — one more and the boy would have failed. "N-No, I need to die," Scott said, his voice wavering horribly, "I can't survive without him."

"Sure, you can. I know it seems like the end of the world right now, and that nothing will ever get better, but I promise you that's not the case. Please, don't do it."

"I have to." Scott's words were forced, and even as he said it he took a tiny step back towards the boy. The boy, encouraged, rushed to keep speaking. "No, you don't. You don't have to do anything. Everything will be all right. Just come back over here, okay?" he said gently, smiling slightly when Scott inched more away from the edge. "That's it," he boy coaxed, "just a bit farther. You can do it. Everything will be okay."