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Thirty Five

|Olivia|

I exited the bathroom, attempting to put my hair up. It felt nice to be in a place that wasn't a bus. I went to the mirror, hoping that it would help, and it did somewhat.

"Hey, babe." Spencer greeted, sitting on the bed. "We need to talk."

I closed my eyes briefly and swallowed. "Yeah, sure. What about?"

"Chad told me what you said," he stated, "Do you really think that our relationship is meaningless?"

His voice sounded hurt, and it killed me. Why would he think that I said that? Because I didn't.

"No." I replied, "I never said that. I said that I didn't want a meaningless relationship. I was worried because I thought you were upset that I wanted to save our first kiss." I explained, "You always talk about kissing me on my birthday, and I want to save that."

After a few seconds in silence, Spencer laid his hand on my waist and his chin on mu shoulder.

"I'm sorry." He murmured, "It's just, I don't want to lose you, Liv."

I looked up to Spencer's reflection in the mirror. I smiled, "Baby, you won't lose me. I promise."

"Alright, break it up, kids." Joel laughed, opening the door.

I rolled my eyes and turned around, Spencer gently kissing my cheek. Joel groaned as Spencer wrapped his arm around me.

"You ready, love?" Luke asked.

I swallowed and nodded, "Y-Yeah, I guess so."

I looked up to Spencer , kissing his cheek. He smiled, "Be careful, princess."

~*~*~

Joel put his hand on top of mine as I stared at the cemetery. It was hard to believe that a year and a half ago we had just lost my mom, and uncle. It hurt, a lot.

"It's okay, love." Joel whispered.

I nodded slightly. Luke sighed and looked back to me, "We all miss her."

"I just really miss her, she wasn't even supposed to be out that night." I whimpered. I quickly wrap my arms around Joel and buried my face into his shoulder as I began sobbing.

"Sh. It's okay, darling." Joel whispered, kissing my head, and rubbing my back. Even his voice sounded broken, "We all miss her. Your mum was a gift to this world."

"She'd be so proud of you, Olivia." Joey assured.

"He's right. This is exactly what your mum wanted, for you to spread a light." Luke agreed.

Joel tightened his grip on me, and I felt his tears on my skin. That only caused me to cry harder. It was because of these men that I haven't fallen yet, because they were to catch me.

"D-Do you remember the time you first sang in church and did your first solo. Your mom was so happy. Or that time the three of us made a mess in the kitchen when making cookies? And your dad almost got mad until we threw flour on him?" Jamie attempted to laugh, but only choked out tears.

I had calmed down some, but still sniffled as Joel held me, and rubbed my back. He truly was like an older brother to me in a sense; him, Luke and Joey.

"Thank you. I love you, Joel." I murmured.

"I love you too, dear." He whispered, "I've always seen you like my little sister."

I pulled back, attempting to calm my breathing and wipe my eyes. Joel did the same thing, sniffling.

"So many tears," Jamie attempted to joke.

"Stop crying, love." Joel whispered, "You're too much of a princess to cry. You're priceless."

~*~*~

I looked back to the car, then stared at my mom's headstone. The thing was, it still hurt. It never really stopped hurting. Losing a person was hard.

I sat on the ground, fidgeting with my hands in my lap. I looked back to the stone.

"Oh, momma." I whispered, "I miss you so much. Daddy died not too long ago, in last October. I miss you both. I was taken in by a good friend. Luke and Joel try to help out as well. This miss you. Moriah misses her best friend, momma. Joey always say that you'd be proud of me. I wish you could meet him. Spencer's a pretty great guy too. I have a good feeling about him." I let out a choked sob, "I miss you, mommy. I miss the fun we would have together, especially with Jamie. I have career now, and it's all because of you and God. I love you, momma."

I just stared at the stone, tears rolling down my cheeks. I knew God had a plan, we just don't understand at the time.

"Hey there, darling."

I looked up, seeing Luke kneel down next to me.

I sighed, "Hey, Lukey."

"You feeling okay?" He asked.

"If okay means like absolute crap, then yes." I muttered, "I just wish she was still here."

"We all do, love." Luke whispered.

I wiped my tears with my sleeve. Luke sighed and wrapped his arm around me, pulling me into him.

"Why'd she leave that night? Why did my dad remarry some drunk? Why did he have to die?" I whimpered.

"I wish I could answer those, Liv. I really wish I could, but God has us in his hands. Sometimes we just focus on our battles, but we're so blessed, Livie."

I nodded, "I know. I know. Can we just go home now?"

"Of course, love." He whispered. Luke stood up, then gently took my hand and pulled me up. "Let's get going."

A/N

Woah. Talk about sadness. Anyway. So, a uh, little announcement. There's gonna be a few more chapters in this book, then I'm gonna try to focus on Secrets a little. Although, I do love this book.

Okay, enough with my ramblings. Vote and comment!

-xxBabyxxGirlxx😘✌🏻️👌🏼