Requiem For A Dream // Phan

21; Don't be scared.

**TW**

Quote of the day: We have to be fearless, we have to take chances, we can't live life afraid of what comes next, that's not what living is about.

Question of the Day: What did you think of this story so far? Is it too much? Little detail?

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"What? I'm sorry, You're breaking up,"

"Its okay, I was calling to let you know that your mother is okay, and well, she's being discharged later today." I let out a sigh of relief,

"Thanks so much, I will try and get a hold of her as soon as possible." I hung up and turned around to face Gee, I squealed and hugged him tightly.

"Everything good?" He asked, breathlessly.

"Yes, everything is just fine," I smiled,

"Your mom okay?" Phil asked, whipping the eggs, and putting another glop of pancake batter into the pan, Frank was eating some pineapple and watching cartoon network on the giant TV that we had. That suddenly made me feel really good the way I said that. We. Phil an I. Me and Phil. That will never get old.

"Yeah, they said she just got discharged from the hospital."

"I mean, did she do chemo?" Phil asked,

"Most likely, or else they wouldn't have her go home..."

"Unless she's doing chemo at home . . ."

"Well, that would suck, I mean she'd have to go in like every few weeks to get the shot and then as she went home, she'd be throwing her guts up." The thought of my mom in pain made me shiver, and guilt rippled through me.

"When do you think we could go see her?" Gee asked, and I shrugged.

"Well, we don't have a lot of money anymore because of-" Phil cut me off with a hard kiss, purposely telling me silently to shut the fuck up. He pulled away too soon and smiled at me.

"We can go later on in the week if you'd like," He said, I beamed, and I threw my arms around him.

"Thank you! Thank you!" I repeated to him, but he shrugged it off with a warm smile. Gee and Frank were cuddling on the couch while Phil and I made the rest of breakfast while blasting Artic Monkeys. I swear, I had maybe 6 cups of black coffee, I was so exhausted. I hadn't done anything like this in a while. 

All of a sudden, Patrick came back to mind, the small boy with the fedora, who had given me advice about my mom . . . I wanted to see him again. I truly did, even though the time we spent with each other was brief, I still wanted to see how he was doing.

"Phil?" He hummed in response, giving plates to Gee and Frankie, them replying with 'thank yous'

"Do you think we could go back to the rehab center later today?" He looked up at me with wary eyes, Gee as well.

"Uh, Yeah sure, did you forget something?"

"Um. . . yeah. Sort of." I said,

"Do you have a smoke, Gee?"

"Yawp," He threw me his pack and I grabbed one, tossing it back to him. I went out to the deck outside, Phil following behind with one of the plates filled with various foods we had made. I grabbed it, thanking him, and he nodded in response, sitting on one of the old lawn chairs. It was a cold day out, but not freezing, just warm, kind of.

"Can I?" He asked, I lifted my brow,

"You smoke?" I asked,

"No, But I'll try anything once. I mean, why not?" I shrugged and gave him the cancer stick.

"So, why do you actually wanna go?" I knew he didn't believe me, He's Phil we're talking about, he basically knows everything about me, and when I'm lying.

"There was this kid . . . " He took a drag, his eyes widened as he coughed. He gave it back and I breathed it in, relaxing myself.

"Kid?" He laughed

"No, like me, but, different sorta. He talked to me after my phone call with you . . ." He looked up at the sky and leaned back in his chair,

"What did he say?" He was curious, I expected him to be jealous or something along the lines of possessive but no, he was genuine.

"Well, he like, I don't know, told me some stuff that made a lot of sense at the time. He told me that I would get better and that my mom was really sick. At the time, I thought, Whoa, how does this guy know what the hell is going on," I flicked my cigarette on the mantel and breathed more in, "But then I realized that he was right, that everything he said was true."

"So, what do you want to do once you're there?" He asked, I hadn't thought about that. Honestly, I just wanted a hug from him, I feel like he had hope in me, that nobody else did. Gee definitely helped out, but Patrick didn't know me, Had only talked to me once, and told me so much.

"Maybe, I could just talk to him." I said. He nodded,

"Eat something, you're already skinny enough, dork." I laughed and he ruffled my hair, opened the sliding door, and went back in.And maybe for at least fifteen minutes I sat and thought while scarfing down the pancakes and eggs. I nibbled on the bacon and still, nothing came to mind at the fact I wanted to see him. I mean, didn't he have someone? He was after all by himself, but maybe he had someone waiting for him, maybe not. But I know for sure I will be, I barely know him, yet I developed a soft spot for him. Not a liking, I have Phil now, thank god, but just, I care about him a lot now.

That made me wonder more, where was Vic and Kellin? Were they still sober? I'm guessing no, since the tales that they told me about how many times their parents made them go to rehab. Then one after another, thoughts just started flowing through me. Where was Brendon? Did Phil ever talk to him? Brendon has a lot more shit to deal with than me, hell, he could go to jail because he was a dealer.I didn't want to think of Brendon being in a cell by himself, so I just settled with the thought of him getting extremely tipsy and high, and just generally having a good time, with Ryan by his side.

"Dan?" I heard a voice, I turned to see Gee. I smiled at him, stood up and gave him a hug.

"You okay? You've been out here awhile. . ."

"Yeah, I think so."

"You think so?" I sighed and he held my waist.

"Yeah, I do. I was just over thinking." I put my head on his shoulder as we rocked back and forth.

"Bout what?" Gee asked,

"Everything. All at once." He snickered,

"That's dangerous." He said,

"I know," I smiled.