Ballerina Boy

18

Harry hasn't talked to me in a while.

I think it's about two weeks to be exact.

I don't understand why he had such a freak out?

I mean I was only trying to see if he liked me.

He knows I wouldn't tell anybody if he actually did have feelings for me.

"Louis honey? Why are you staring down that wall?" my mom asked as she walked into the kitchen and I guess saw me looking at the wall as I sat at the kitchen island.

"I'm thinking." I answered shortly.

"About what? You have seemed a little gloomy lately."

"I think this straight guy likes me."

"You think a straight guy likes you?" my mom asked confused. "He wouldn't be straight then."

"Well he's probably in the closet mom."

"Well true." she nodded. "But why do you think this?"

"He kissed me when he was drunk."

"Well he was drunk Louis." mom said to me.

"But when I asked him about it last week he got all upset and then started saying it's not okay to be gay and he didn't want to die."

"What?" mom asked shocked.

"I know." I nodded. "I don't understand what that means."

"Maybe he thinks that he's going to hell?" mom asked. "I mean a lot of in the closet people have that fear."

"Yeah but that doesn't mean that they think they are going to die if they come out."

"Maybe it's his parents?" mom said shrugging. "Maybe he lives in a religious household?"

"I dunno." I shrugged.

Mom and I stayed silent for a moment.

"I wish he'd just talk to me about it." I then said.

"Well Louis you can't force someone out of the closet. Sometimes in that stressful state that they are in, it causes them to lash out and it sometimes makes them stay in the closet and say they are straight."

"Well I want him to be comfortable with himself."

"And in time it will happen. It just won't happen right now." mom shrugged. "But I was on my way to the store. Want to come?" she then asked as she grabbed her keys off the counter.

"No. I'll stay here." I said shaking my head.

"Well alright." mom nodded and then walked to the exit of the kitchen. "Love you Louis."

"Love you too mom." I smiled and then she was gone.

I sat there at the kitchen island for another moment but then got up and made my way to Lottie's room.

I knocked and then heard her call out, "Come in."

I then walked in and closed the door behind me.

"Louis?" she asked surprised.

"Hey." I smiled softly and then sat down on her bed with her.

"What's up twin twin?" she then asked me once I cuddled into her.

"I've just been a little blue this week."

"Yeah I know."

"You know too?" I then asked.

"Everyone can tell Lou." she said like it was obvious.

"Really?" I asked shocked.

"Yeah." she nodded. "So what's wrong?"