Just Can't Be Forgotten - [boyxboy]

twenty-four

why do I keep doing this to myself? lol I think you're all well aware (or I hope) what these author notes before the chapter mean bc I certainly don't :) (joke)

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Alan felt his body freeze, and so did Austin. They both sat there, in shock, staring at each other. Austin couldn't believe he said that out loud and he didn't know whether to feel happy or scared, because he did love Alan, he already had, but he felt like he just ruined what they had by admitting it out loud. It wasn't supposed to come out, but it just... did, and now there was a silence that surrounded them and Austin wasn't sure if he liked the way Alan was staring at him or not.

"You...love me," Alan said softly, his heart hammering in his chest and he wasn't sure if it were butterflies or nervousness that filled his stomach as he thought over the possibility that, yes, Austin may love him.

Austin didn't say anything, his mouth was dry and his hands were growing clammy and his heart felt like it was going to explode. He felt sick to his stomach, but then again he felt happy. He loved Alan, he knew that, but he was just so nervous that the ginger wouldn't feel the same way.

God, this was just like when they first got together- though Alan probably didn't remember that. Austin had never been in love before, it was always meaningless hook ups, nothing more and nothing less, but Alan somehow changed that for the brunette- how he did, Austin would never know- and they had began to know each other more, spend more time together than what Austin would usually do, and in the end, after many months and several dates, Austin felt this strange feeling in the pit of his stomach every time he saw Alan enter the room or when they talked to each other, he felt this spark go off whenever they touched or kissed, and Austin was afraid to know what it was, but when he did, it was the best feeling ever, but also the worst because he didn't know how or if Alan felt the same way.

"I do," Austin mumbled softly, his voice barely above a whisper. He felt sick and happy and like he could throw up rainbows, oddly enough. He didn't know if he wanted Alan to love him back or not.

Alan felt his heart flutter and a smile form on his lips as he slowly edged his way into the brunettes lap to straddle his waist. It was clear to him that Austin felt scared and looked shy and timid like a small child, but Alan couldn't help but smile and giggle as he made the brunette look up.

"I think it's safe to say that I love you, too," Alan said, his arms wrapping around Austin's neck, and his fingers tangling in the hairs on the back of head. The brunettes hair was so soft and Alan loved how it felt between his fingers.

"You do?" Austin asked, definitely sounding like a small child, as he looked up at the ginger through his lashes.

"Of course, you've been here for me when I've needed you the most and we've been through a lot, and I just... I know it hasn't been that long since we've been together, but I really, really, do love you, Austin," Alan told him, and Austin couldn't help but smile. This was almost exactly how it went the first time, except there was no horribly cooked food and the drapes in the kitchen hadn't caught on fire.

"You're so perfect," Austin said, and he hated himself for not realizing that sooner. It was always Alan, no matter how hard Austin tried to not see that when they weren't together.

Alan smiled and leaned in, pressing a kiss to the brunettes lips. It was supposed to be sweet and simple, but something inside both of them ignited and Alan was pressing his lips harder against Austin's.

The brunettes hands began to wander, moving from Alan's hips to beneath his shirt as the kiss deepened and heated up. He felt the smooth skin that was confined beneath the fabric of Alan's shirt and he could feel the slight bulge in the gingers shorts pressing against his thigh.