Filling in the Cracks

Chapter 48: Dumb Dumber and Dumbest

I straightened out my black fitted dress and slipped on my black flats heading out to my car. As I placed the peonies and carnations safely on the passenger seat I turned on my car and headed out the gates in front of the penthouse.

As I was coming closer to my destination I saw a park and kids swinging, eating ice-cream, laughing, etc. They all looked so happy and carefree that I slightly envied them. But hey what's not to envy? They're kids and they have no worries.

I parked on the side by the concrete and grabbed the pink peonies that still smelled fresh. I smiled knowing they were my mothers favorites. Then I grabbed the yellow carnations, (Gramps' favorite) locked the car, and walked towards my destination.

As I reached I slowly sat on the familiar ground taking in the surroundings. The afternoon sky was cloudy and filled with rain clouds, but that gave me no worry. I was going to spend as much time here as I needed.

I placed the pink peonies in front of the tombstone that read:

In Loving Memory of Jillian Cynthia Andrews, our loved warrior will forever be missed.

Told ya my mom was a warrior. Whoops, correction. My mom is a warrior.

I told myself that when I came here I wouldn't be weak. I'd show my mom that I was strong too, even though I miss her like crazy.

"Hiya, mom." I spoke out with a weak smile grazing my hand over the tombstone placing down the pink peonies.

"Hi to you too, Gramps." I said smiling at Gramps' tombstone.

I turned back to my mother's tombstone and held back the urge to cry. "We all miss your favorite warrior." I smiled weakly before letting out a soft laugh, "And your noodles too." If anyone wanted noodles, they knew without having to think twice to go to; Jillian Andrews.

"I really miss you mom and I demand you to come back and grant me another chance for another goodbye, I could really use you." I said in all honesty. I really did miss my mom. Ever since we found about the disease she was a stay-at-home mom, the mom I never had and always hoped for.

We had to reschedule the wedding (again) since I spent most of January and a little bit of February in the hospital. We hadn't plan anything, not a bit. We decided to keep it in April, that would give us about two months to plan. We didn't need long since it was going to be a small wedding. I just need my bestfriends and family, not crazy paparazzi jumping over fences to take pictures. And when I say jump over fences.

I mean it.

On the topic of friends; Kayden had been avoiding me since the dinner. He even grew back his stubble. As I said before; gross, facial hair. But somehow he manages to make it look good and don't ask me how because not even I know the answer to that. Maybe it's the careless façade.

Today the wedding invitations were being mailed out so I decided to hold a small luncheon and give it to Nalani, Mac, Kayden, Matt, James, Zo, Chels, Brandon, dad, Britt, Kailee, Sierrah, Grace, Cleo, Joshua, and the rest of our 'small' group of closest friends and family.

I had gotten RSVP'd from everyone besides Kayden. I am so shocked.

Sarcasm intended of course.

I told the gang I was going to run a few errands before lunch, and here I am. Fulfilling my errand duty.

I snapped back to my reverie when a little boy placed a white rose on the grass as who I suppose is his mother, quietly sobbed. I couldn't help but feel a pang of sympathy for them. Here I was crying over my mom at the age of 23 (almost 24) when a little boy had just lost someone special to him, maybe his father, or grandfather. But that isn't the point.