That Peculiar Feeling | Mphfpc ~Enoch O'Connor~

Chapter Seven

A/N~ I decided to do a little illustration for this chapter :)

The two dolls lunged, jabbed, ducked. It was like a mini Battle Royale. The doll with metal legs tackled the other onto it's back, making slashes at it with it's knife hands.

I didn't know whether I was enjoying the battle, or absolutely scared silly. Olive seemed to be enjoying it though.

The doll with scissor hands pushed the other off and jumped to it's feet, then with one single thrust forward, it plunged it's left scissor straight through the tiny heart of the other doll. It fell limp on the table, it's heart impaled on the end of his opponent's weapon.

My mouth was hanging slightly open at this brutal ending. Without realising I reached out to touch the defeated doll. I couldn't suppress the feeling of pity for it.

I looked up at Enoch, who was staring at my hand touching the dead doll.

"Is it dead?" I asked, quickly after I said this I realised how concerned I sounded for this 'thing'. It's a doll Eden, it can't feel pain, surely not.

"Well it's not alive anymore." Enoch answered sarcastically, grabbing the doll from under my hand and stuffing it into one of the desk's drawers.

"Are you going to give it a second chance?" I said, without thinking. Great job Eden, now I sound like a idiot.

The boy looked at me with the extreme confusion, "A second chance?"

"You know, redemption, a chance to try again."

He shook his head, as if to get rid of a feeling he didn't want in his head.

"It had its chance, and it failed."

Nobody said anything for a few seconds, then a loud bell rang out from upstairs.

"Time for dinner, come on Eden, you can sit next to me if you like." said Olive cheerfully, as she linked my arm and skipped happily out of the basement.

I glanced at my watch, it was only four thirty, that was going to take some getting used to.

...

I sat down slowly at the long wooden dinner table, it wasn't as fancy the one my parents used for their dinner parties, though I'm desperately hoping that they don't serve caviar here.

Olive plopped herself in the chair next to me, and smiled a warm, friendly smile. She was genuinely kind, I liked her for that.

The other children began to flood into the dining room, sitting in their preferred seats. I saw Bronwyn, Claire, Millard, Hugh, then Horace, Fiona, Emma and the twins. Enoch, however, was nowhere to be seen.

There were trays packed with hot food on the table, I even saw the massive carrot we watched Fiona grow. Even with all this food in front of me, I wasn't the slightest bit hungry. I stared at my lap and fiddled with my skirt.

When Miss Peregrine entered the room, all the chatter went quiet.

"Good evening Miss Peregrine." Chanted all the children simultaneously.

"Good evening, children." She replied as she sat at the head of the table. Her sharp eyes scanned over the table.

"Enoch is fashionably late as always." She stated.

"He'll be up in a minute, he's just cleaning up." chimed Olive.

"Very well, tuck in children."

The noise resumed and everyone filled their plates. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Enoch slip into his seat and start eating.

"So Eden," Olive said, after filling her plate. "Where did you live before you came here?"

"Oh, Belfast." I replied, I smiled slightly, her cheer was contagious.

I was sitting near Miss Peregrine's end of the table, with Olive on my right and little Claire on my left.

"How has your first day been Eden? Everyone has been welcoming I hope?" Said Miss Peregrine, catching my attention. Everyone seemed quiet their conversations slightly to hear me speak.

"Oh, yeah, everyone's been really nice." I said, barely loud enough so that she could hear it. I hated having so much attention, people listening to every word you say, I wasn't used to it.

"Good, I think you're going to fit in splendidly here." She smiled. I liked her smile, it was reassuring.

I heard a low cough from the end of the table, then someone mutter; "Fit in my ars."

Miss Peregrine shot a death glare to the opposite end of the table.

"What was that, Enoch?"

Un-phased by the headmistress' glare, Enoch said; "I'm sorry Miss Peregrine, but I'm afraid you've brought a normal into our loop, and I don't see how a normal is going to ever fit in here." He said it matter-of-fact-ly, which made it sting more.

Everyone had fallen silent. Olive looked at Enoch with a 'please just drop it' look. I stopped pushing the uneaten food around my plate and turned to the headmistress.

"I-I think I'm going to finish unpacking upstairs, thank you for the lovely meal, but after today, I've lost my appetite." I said, my voice shaking. I knew it was a lie, I had already unpacked the few things I had brought, but I had to get out of the room.

Before she could answer, I stood up and quickly walked towards the stairs, my boots echoing on the wooden floor as I left. My curly black hair hiding my face, for once I was grateful for it. I felt everyone's eyes burning into my back as I made my escape.
...
I leaned against the closed door of my new bedroom, and took a deep, shaky exhale. I hated this feeling, like my rib cage was being pressed inwards, like someone had put a heavy weight on my chest. My face hot and my legs quivering.

My parents had brought me to several therapists for it, they were those people who thought they didn't need a diagnosis. So I was unofficially internet-diagnosed with mild bipolar and anxiety. Even though I didn't understand the two conditions, I knew well enough not to take the pills they prescribed to me, so I hid them in the flower vase in my bedroom. My Mother even tried to slip some into my messenger bag this morning, I threw them overboard. I stopped trying to explain what I was feeling to them a long time ago.

I paced around the small room, breathing heavily. I wasn't angry, was I? I wasn't sad, or maybe I was? I threw myself onto my bed, staring the ceiling.

Rejected by the very place where people rejected by society go. Pathetic. Why can't I just fit in?, even for a day, just to know what it feels like.

There was a quiet knock on the door, then Olive poked her head in.

"Eden, Miss Peregrine asked me to fetch you for the reset."

*side note* I'm not trying to make fun of anyone who has bipolar or anxiety, and just to clarify, she doesn't actually have the disorders, she was just unofficially diagnosed with them :)