Our Love Goes On and On

Walt Disney Makes It All Better...Right?

"It's Disney time!"

 "You're waking me up to tell me Pocahontas is on?"

I heard him gasp, "That's not what I'm talking about, but how dare you insult my fantasy wife like that?"

"Phil, I haven't even gotten out of bed yet, I don't have time to fake an apology."

We both started to laugh as I got up to start my day. It was probably the first day I didn't wake up scared because I didn't feel my husband next to me. I was getting better...slowly, but I was getting better.

"How'd you sleep last night?"

"Good, actually. I didn't even..." I stood in the mirror and looked at my face, "Don't you have a girlfriend? Why are you on the phone with me so early in the morning?"

"Oh, Amy's at a promotional conference for her new workout discs, so I'm all alone."

"You didn't tell me that."

"She just left this morning."

"Oh, okay." I went to go check on the girls and they were fine, which made going to get myself some coffee a lot easier. "So, if you weren't talking about Pocahontas, what were you talking about?"

"Disneyland, crazy!" he sounded so excited, "Remember? Our trip we planned to Disneyland?"

Oh, God, no.

"Phil...that's a family trip."

"Yeah! Me, Amy, Seth, Leigh, Ada, Dean, Aiden, you, London, my little niece Penelope, and--"

"Roman?"

The line went silent for a few seconds, "This could be your chance to talk to him."

"This would be my first time talking to him."

"What have we talked about? It's been two weeks, you've calmed down, you know what you feel now, so you're ready."

"I've only seen him through a peephole for the last two weeks, I can't just see him in Disneyland all of a sudden."

"At least you're not copping out and not going."

"I shouldn't go! Thank you so much, Phil!"

"You're going, Buttercup, don't even try backing out of it." I laughed at the little nickname, "The trip is paid for already, which means you have no choice but to go."

"I'll just send the girls with him, that way we only lose money with me, you know? It won't be that much of a loss if it's just me that doesn't go."

"Shut up, you're going."

I sat down on the couch and turned on the TV, "I don't want to go and have fun. Fun means I've accepted what he's done, and I haven't."

"It's not like you'll be having fun with him. You're going to be having fun with your girls and everyone else...not him."

That's true. If I went, I'd be going for everyone else, not him. I could be an adult about this and not do anything to mess up the trip. I could do that, right?

"Phil, promise me one thing, please?"

"Anything."

"Take care of me on this trip. Don't let me go off the deep end, okay?

"Okay."

One week later:

I think it was Ada's idea for us to have this pre-trip dinner. I didn't really want to go, but Amy was dying to meet me. Phil talked about her all the time, but I had never met her.