hi
guess who it is again
sadly, me
anyways I've realized that nobody's reading this shit and I get why.
I'll just get to one of the things I was gonna take note of
Recently I've been eating less and less, and I honestly think I fell into anorexia, as there's some days when I'm not eating at all. So far nobody has noticed, which is a good thing I guess.
When I eat, it makes me feel bloated and like shit.
I can't eat anything without that feeling. (maybe some things, but eventually I'll feel sick, or like I shouldn't have eaten that.)
so yeah I'm gonna resort to not eating at all and see how that goes for awhile. If it helps then I don't give a shit.
If it worsens things then oh well.
I just feel like throwing up, no matter what I do (hence the title of the fucking book). But me losing weight is a big thing for a few people around me anyways so I'll keep my mouth shut.
I knew anorexia was a thing from the start and that it's really risky to suddenly change your eating patterns, but fuck it. I don't feel anything or much emotionally, might as well resort to it physically.
I guess you could say I feel like a ghoul? I'll see pictures of food and yeah if it looks nice enough (and I know what's in it) then I'll be like any normal person and feel tempted to eat it.
But then I remember that it'll make me feel bad and I instantly get turned off.
