So today I had my checkup appointment at the doctors office right
And I can't say it went very well (at least for me)
For one, let me say the following-
Honestly, nothing against the doctor, they were fine but
At the start my mom was in the room and my doctor uses my dead name and I just fucken sit there and it's pretty obvious I'm uncomfortable about it
So yknow the doc is nice enough to ask me if I don't use or go by that name anymore and since my mom was in the room I had to suck it up as I was referred to as 'she' and my deadname the entire time
I'm looking back this makes me feel like shit. And the sad kind of shitty feeling too.
And to add onto that here there's a system where they make you fill out a bunch of questions like "have you had sex/used drugs/whatever the fuck these past few years?"
And of course there's gonna be questions about your mental health
I answered no to every fucking question.
"Have you ever had or been having suicidal thoughts?"
No
"Have you ever attempted suicide or self harm?"
No
"Has an adult abused you physically or verbally?"
No.
There was more, but here's the thing:
I wanted to answer yes to every fucking question.
I didn't tell the truth because my mom was there and make a big deal out of it or just make fun of me for it.
In fact, I showed her the question about physical abuse and she fucking told me to check the 'no' box.
And during the fucking checkup she also just makes jokes about the fact that I'm a teenager now and that what I'm experiencing is 'normal'.
I don't know if I can take much more of this, tbh.
