My Brother's Best Friend | ✓

07. "are you sure?"

"What are you doing?" I yell grabbing my book from of Sawyer's hands. "I-I'm sorry, it was just here. I didn't mean to-".

"Oh please, like you didn't mean to spy on me while I was changing?" I huff and stomp upstairs. Sitting down on my bed I wanna die after letting what I did, sink in. I don't know where all that anger came from all of a sudden but I regret all of it. Great, now he hates me.

After throwing my diary back into the same box I found it I bury my face into my hands. I'm just expecting Ryan to barge into my room yelling at me for getting mad at his best friend. I decide to text Camille and tell her everything that happened until I hear a knock on my door.

"Who is it?" I ask. "The jerk" a muffled voice says. I open the door and find Sawyer standing there. I notice Ryan's door is closed meaning he's probably asleep already. "Can we talk?" he asks nervously. I just step aside letting him walk in, and close the door behind us so no one can overhear the conversation.

"Look I'm so sorry for going through it, I honestly just saw it and couldn't help myself".

"Yea I know" I mutter.

"Are you mad?".

"Kinda. I mean- no. You didn't read all of it did you?" I lay down on my bed and rest my chin on my knuckles. "Not the last few pages, that's for sure" he jokes walking up to the bed. My face turns bright red and I face plant into the mattress.

"I hope you don't mind me asking but, did you really mean all that stuff you wrote?" Yes.

"No" I laugh nervously. I feel an indent in the mattress as he sits down next to me. "Are you sure?".

"No". He chuckles slightly. "How about we both stop lying?" he says.

"I'll tell the truth if you promise to as well". Sighing softly I roll my eyes. I sit up and cross my legs, to face him. "Fine".

"Yesterday, I was walking by when your room door was wide open. I knew I shouldn't have, but I just couldn't look away" he explained as I blushed. "It was wrong and I'm sorry". I give him a soft smile trying to contain my many emotions. "It's okay" I say.

"Now it's your turn" he shifts to face me even more. I fear the worst, when his mouth opens again to speak. But as usual, I find myself distracted by his features. The prominent jawline and the way his eyes are focused on me so intently.

"Did you actually mean all that stuff? About you, liking me. And all those things you wish I could do to you?".

"So what if I did" I ask getting off the bed. I walk over to dresser trying to avoid eye contact with him. My heart racing so fast, I feel his body come in contact with mine. His hands find their way to my hips and I quickly turn around.

He closes the space between us completely and I back into the dresser so much, I'm afraid it would leave a dent in the wall. I gulp and blink quickly, trying to determine whether I'm dreaming or not. "Because, Holly," he smirks.

"That changes everything" he brings his face close to mine causing me to lose my breath for a second. "How so?" I ask shakily.

"Because, this means that you feel it too" he says. I pull out of his hold and aimlessly walk over to my door. "I uh- I just remembered I have to- do this thing, downstairs" I bite my lip. "I'll just- I'll go" I say before running out and nearly falling to my death on the stairs.

I catch my breath in the bathroom next to the kitchen. Staring at my self in the mirror I ask myself, why? How could I just deny everything I've been wanting like that?

He was right there and I just had to leave. I guess I was scared. Scared of what my brother would do if he found out. He's incredibly overprotective and I don't think he'd be too happy knowing his best friend got with his little sister. I turn on the taps and splash cold water on my face.

Finally I manage to walk out of the bathroom. I find the courage to walk back to my room but to my surprise, he's gone. I let out a sigh of relief, but I kinda wish I'd stayed. I lay on my bed and try to close my eyes.

I struggle trying to fall asleep because now that my dreams have become a reality, I want more. I can't help but think of what might have happened if I had stayed.

Normally I would have told Camille all about this by now, but for some reason I want to keep it to myself for a bit. I don't feel the urge to let her know what happened, mainly because I don't even know, myself.

Finally after 3 hours of sleep I wake up. I throw on my outfit for the day and head to the kitchen.

There, I find my mom having a conversation with Sawyer about something that seems to make her laugh a bit too much. "Good morning, Holly" Sawyer smirks. "Hey Sawyer".

"How'd you sleep?" mom asks. "Not that great" I reply.

The awkward morning chit chat goes on until I finally escape after breakfast. Half-asleep I'm lacing up my converse when I realize I left my bag upstairs. I begin to get up as I hear a cough from Sawyer who is standing over me with a familiar black backpack in his hand. "Forgetting something?" 

I grin and take the bag from him. "Thanks". Straightening out my crop top, I stand up, getting ready to leave. I watch him as he takes a step closer to me and leans into my ear. He whispers something with his low husky voice that causes my stomach to flip and my cheeks burn red.

"Hey, that's a really cute little outfit you're wearing, but I think you'd look even better with it off".