Tears Of The Rose

Ill

It starts with a echoing
Hollowness in my ears
Rendering me deaf
All sound muffled
Everything nonexistent
To my sudden zoomed in world
Consists of only me
Me myself and I

It's happening
Again
aGaiN
AgAIn

That sudden
Weakness that overwhelms
Overpowers overcomes

Me
I am weak
My vision fills
Whirling with billions of
White swirling dots
Blocking out everything
Leaving me blind

My senses I can no longer trust
They have turned against me
My body betraying its master
The fraility of human kind
Materialing as physical weakness

And robot like I struggle
My human body a burden
Which I must carry
On its tiresome journey
No obstacles must stop me
My cold unfeeling mind repeats
Like a broken tape recorder
I must go on
I must push on

This human instinct
Guiding me as I stumble
Blind, up the stairs,
My feet feeling the steps
Dragging my body, a burden,
Up against gravity
Hand gripping the cold metal bar
Meant for the elderly

I'm a youth
Yet stubborn I am
I refuse to allow my mouth
To whisper for help
I refuse to stop
To rest and regain my energy
I refuse to be seen weak
And so I fight on, fight on,
Fighting not to collapse
Into a weak trembling pile

Determination burns in me
A cold fire lighting my body
In its icy flames
Sweat on my neck
Yt I feel it not
Only the whirling stars
Swimming around me
Cotton stuffed into my ears
Yet when I bring my eyes up
My eyes are sound
My ears are empty

Slowly but surely
It passes
Like what all incidents, acidents
Illnesses, like a flash flood
Hit hard but leave in the next
Instance

And I'm left
With my body
Returned back to me
By those traitorous cells
That make up my body
I return to hard reality
Sweat on the back of my neck
My mind in shattered pieces
Scattered and afraid

But I'm safe
Safe from that sudden
Onslaught of illness

For now