Holding back

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Trying, desperately,
Choking it back
Heart sore, eyes hurting
Lips trembling, hands shaking
But still I try
To hold back the tears

Why do I hurt
Why does it hurt
Is it merely my sensitivity
Or is it the truth resonating
Deep inside my honest soul

Why do I hold back tears
Tears that will make it better
Tears that will make it worse,
Tears that will release me
Tears that will ruin me;

My hidden tears
My sobbing heart
Drowning in a sea of hidden tears
Forever hidden, for they are ny weaknesses
Or do I yet again succumb
To the thought that whispers

Tears are worthless,
Nothing but concentrated saltwater
Meaningless drops of sorrow
Wasted, and ruining composture
Tears are just mere water

And still I ache
Heart bleak and eyes:
Just slightly watery;
My pain, hidden like my tears
Beneath a smile
Under laughter

Someone...help me

****
Wow ain't this depressing

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