bonjour • joshler •

trente-six

he walked in the doorway, a sunken feeling in his chest. expecting to be home alone once again, he slammed the door shut with all of his might. out of anger? he doesn't know. his fingers grew ice cold, however, when he heard a saddened voice behind him.

"josh? are you okay?"

he turned around, seeing his mothers worried expression hint at her face, "oh, hi mom"

"is everything alright? where's tyler? is he not out with you?"

josh hesitated, "uh no he's - he's with friends right now"

"you know, now that i think of it we should throw a 'going away' party for him this week" his mom started, "you can invite everyone, it would be fun!"

"this - this week?"

she raised her eyebrows, "you were too busy having fun and not thinking about dates weren't you?"

"yeah," he coughed to cover his hitching breath, "fun"

"oh! i forgot to ask," his mother piped up, "how's debby been? you haven't talked about her in a while"

"you haven't been home in a while. and we broke up - like three weeks ago" he started for the stairs, angry at the situation he was in since he just wanted to be alone.

she ignored josh's first statement, "broke up? oh honey you must be devastated i'm so sorr-"

"i broke up with her. and i'm leaving now bye" he climbed up the stairs, exhausted and frustrated from what had happened.

knowing in a mater of minutes, his mom would come up to his room and start a pointless and dry, "how are you?" conversation. he hated those conversations.

knowing he couldn't stay in his room, he contemplated going on the roof and watching the darkening sky just to turn his brain off for a couple of minutes. yet, he knew that wouldn't work, since all stupid sunsets remind him of tyler.

he didn't know what to do.

no matter what he would either be forced to talk or think of tyler. both things which consisted of thoughts josh really didn't want to think about right then. he figured all of his friends were comforting tyler. of course, josh was the bad guy.

there was only one person that he knew wasn't with them.

this might be awkward but are you free rn

*****: uh yeah why

need someone and ur kind of the only person that i thought of

*****: thought you have tyler

not really anymore. can i come over?

*****: fine hurry up

thanks so much

he then hurriedly ran back down the stairs, grabbing car keys next to the front door. however, right as his hand grazed the doorknob he was stopped once again by his mom.

"where are you going now?" she sat with her eyebrows raised.

"oh um to tyler- back to tylers- where tyler is right now- at my friends house"

yeah. he was a great liar.

"alright. don't sleep over or anything okay? it seems like i haven't seen you in forever" the mom sighed, josh wondered how she didn't seem suspicious of him.

"thanks i'll be home soon i guess"

halfway out the door josh paused for a split second, hearing his mom call to him kindly, "stay safe! make good decisions!"

he exited the house sighing, hearing her voice bounce in his brain.

make good decisions