Hiding My Pain (Completed)

°Chapter Thirty Six-√ Part 2-Revealed.

"Don't forgive him. Forgive yourself for believing you lack of something because he wasn't there"
_

______________________________________

★†★

Dawn.

Revealing your past is not as easy as it sounds especially if you've lived a life in a ball of pain and sadness. I wasn't sure what I wanted to come out of telling my life story, I wasn't sure I he'd stay bymy side like he's said after I finished my story. Hell I wasn't sure of anything anymore.

Now here I am sitting on my bed in a clothes I've worn for two days straight , probably smelling like a raccoon but I couldn't care less. Then there's Damien, I bad boy who's facade faids away when he's alone with me. A boy who I promised I wouldn't fall for and yet I'm falling everyday. Here he sits as he continue to stare at me for my story to continue.

Maybe deep down all I needed was Damien's company , maybe he's my weakness and my strength, a very dangerous combination.

I sigh and look at Damien , then he reached towards my face , crease my cheeks and deeply look into my eyes. I could stare into his mesmerizing beautiful orbs all day and not get tired but yet all I want to do is turn away from him. I didn't want to see pitty , especially not from him , I didn't want him to pitty me.

"Baby if you can't continue then don't, I've heard it all"

My orbs met his and I could deeply see the concerns and emotion written on his face. It made my heart beat faster and butterflies in my stomach . But I needed to finished my story, I needed him to know . I sigh out loud and looked at the wall as I relived my memories.

"Two weeks after I found out I was preganent I told him. I thought that it would change his behavior and go back to the man I fell in love with. When I told him he was ecstatic . From that moment my hopes spiked and I thought maybe he was just going through something that was hard to open up to me with. But I was wrong, not even five weeks into the pregnancy revealing he went back to himself but it got worse. He'd come home kiss me in the forehead but then he becomes a new man, nights would come when he's around and lash out on me, throw things at me and yell at me. I thought that was all he was ever going to do. But I was wrong, one night he came home drunk, with lipsticks stains and the stench of an unfamiliar perfume , of course I got pissed and went off on him. I shouldn't have though. The next thing I knew I was on ground hold my cheeks that had held with an enormous pain. I remembered looking up at his blazing eyes filled with fire and his shaking body. I thought he only did it because he was angry and drunk and would realized the action he's done. Only he didnt. He had grabbed my chin and held it tightly , forced me to look into his black eyes and spit in my face with venom. I remembered his words of poison and his pain that he inflicted. Days would go on and bruises would appear, whenever Jason called or Kat I would always try to avoid that topic and lie about him, lie to them about Liam. One night I was fast asleep from days of cooking and cleaning and beating I was woken up by him. Only he wasn't alone. I remembered going down the stairs to the kitchen and see him with another girl , I stood there in shock and pain holding my growing belly. Ones they realized I was watching they didn't even stop to think , they continued on to fuck each other like there's no tomorrow. Time after time he would bring that same girl, he would fuck her in front of me. I tried to control myself but each passing day it became an obstical. I had finally decided to leave him one night, I packed everything that I could , planned my escape , when I set out my plan I was almost out the door. My door to freedom was an inch away from me, until I saw him there. He dragged me back inside the house and beat me senseless, beat me for hours, I tried to keep the baby safe but I myself was getting weaker. One kick to the stomach had finally blacked me out. The next thing I knew I was in a hospital, Kat and Jason was there with their pitiful eyes and hatred looks. Although I couldn't worry about them nor myself only the baby, but I was wrong, I remembered the doctor walking in to tell me , that I've lost her"

With each words that comes out of my mouth stabs me in the heart. The memories replayed as I tell them and not one could I ever speak of again.

I look to Damien but he was already staring at me. My heart sped up at the anticeptation for his reaction. Then I fall his hands gentally take between the sides of my face , forcing me to look into his eyes and I did.

"Listen to me Dawn, there is nothing in your past or now thats blaming you for losing her, you've survived through everything that monster did , you've tried to keep her safe , its not your fault and you shouldn't blame yourself, your only a human dawn , you can't do everything. Know that you survived for her"

He leans his forehead against mine.

"I don't know what am I supposed to do, my dark past is always haunting me no matter how much I try to escape them."

And that was the truth , no matter how many runs or escape attempts I do my demons always follows, always there to haunt.

"Then let me share your pain with you."

With that he connects his lips with mine.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°
yeah I know I haven't updated , but I'm only human and actually have a life.

Anyways here's another chapter. There's really nothing much.

1042 words counted.