Audrey Hepburn's Pearls: Part I

Chapter 62.1: 1995, Ruiz

Chapter 62.1: 1995, Ruiz

 

Towards the evening, Mama came home. I heard her throw her purse down on the table from here and worry filled me up. Was she angry about something? Did somebody give her a hard time at work? Did someone ask her to take over a shift later? What was it?

These familiar scared feelings. I didn't want them. On top of everything...it was too much. 

I hadn't done anything all day. Just thought about things, about Ambrose. Wondering what he was doing, what was going on. I knew that with drug addicts, if you don't get your drug you go into withdrawal. Painful, painful withdrawal. Was he okay? Even though he didn't want to see me, I couldn't help but worry about him. I needed to know if he was okay. 

On the end of my bed on top of the Transformers blanket, Zorro was asleep and making little growling noises every now and then. She was on her back, a funny way of sleeping that seemed unique to her, her feet splayed everywhere. Getting up to go greet my Mama, I gave her belly a quick rub and she squeezed in all her fours and gave a rumbling, messy growl. 

"Ruiz! You home? You better be home!" 

Oh, crap, she was angry. Why? Why was she angry? And why was she yelling at me? 

"Yeah, Mama. I'm home, I was coming to greet you," I called to her, opening my door. From the hall, I could see her taking off her jacket and putting it on the back of a chair. 

She didn't look at me.

"How was work?" I was really prodding her to find out the source of her anger. 

"Awful. Cindy messed up this patient's I.V again and again and the lady started crying and her husband started yelling at everybody. Cindy stuck her six times! Six! You're only supposed to stick once and get somebody else! Cindy knows better than that! So they got me to do it. That lady must've had the smallest veins in the planet because I couldn't find a mark, but we had to run an I.V!" Her voice was flying.

"I'm sorry, Mama," I said quietly.

"God, sometimes I don't know what's wrong with people!" She was rummaging through the drawers next to the oven now, jerking them all the way out and throwing things around. I knew what she was looking for before she asked me. In a second she was brandishing a bunch of take-out menus in my direction. "Can you order a pizza or something? I don't care what kind. God-damn Cindy. I'm gonna talk to the LPN about her tomorrow. You don't stick a patient six times! You just don't!"

"Yeah, Mama. Um, what do you want on it?" I stared down at the familiar menus. It felt surreal, seeing them after all this time. I never thought I'd see them again, to be honest. I didn't really think I'd ever be here again, in this same kitchen. I thought I'd be with Ambrose. Oh, Ambrose...if he wasn't like that...what would be doing right now? Would we be eating dinner? Making it? What would he be cooking? 

I realized with nervousness that I was standing in the middle of the kitchen not doing anything, just thinking. Mama had gone into her room and I heard her nurse scrubs coming off, going immediately into the plastic bag she always quarantined them into immediately for a wash. She'd told me hospitals are dirty, no matter what anybody tells you and you have to wash your uniform every day carefully because you never know what kind of disease or infection is on them and anybody who doesn't is stupid.

My mind was wandering. I was supposed to be ordering a pizza.

"Ummm, I guess green peppers. Veggie pizza," she called to me from her room. Oh right, I'd asked her what she wanted. Thank god she'd been thinking and I hadn't missed when she responded. I didn't like veggie pizza, but what she wanted we always had.