Audrey Hepburn's Pearls: Part I

Chapter 92.1: 1995, Ruiz

Chapter 92.1: 1995, Ruiz 

“Fehrlina wants what? We can’t do that. She knows we can’t do that, at least right now. She what? She’s a ballet instructor, Tango. She’s not Houdini. Oh you know what I mean. She cannot become something else overnight. She is not the dove in his sleeve. Tango. Tango, Tango, Tango. I am not wanting a history lesson right now!” Miss Cha Cha started laughing, falling against the wall, talking into the phone to Tango, her partner in crime.

Such a conversation was reminding me of Ambrose. How we used to sit here at the kitchen table eating Cap’n Crunch in the mornings and listen to her go on and on about their dance school into that phone. I checked the clock on the wall. It was about 6:30am. I’d be going to work in almost thirty minutes, having to be there by eight o’clock, but I’d learned so far this week that Alejandro definitely appreciated it when I was early.

“She cannot become a partner. She is too young, inexperienced right now. Si. Siiii, I know she was a student at Madame’s just like you were, but what class was she in? How long after you? That’s right. Bottom line is, she is not experienced enough yet as a teacher. She does not know how our operations work. If she wants to become a partner… Siii, Tango. Yes, talk to her about this. I am not saying no to her forever. She is a very good teacher. But is she management? No, not right now.”

I shoveled some more Cap’n Crunch into my mouth with my fork, a practice Ambrose and I had started because it allowed us to drink less of the super sweet milk. This was reminding me of him more, like he was sitting here right beside me. He’d be reading the back of the box for the ten thousandth time, I knew it. His hand would be gripping the box and he’d be intent on it, reading those silly cartoon stuff.

“She wants to expand her ballet classes. I know that. If she thinks becoming a partner will do that, she is bonkers… Don’t laugh at me, Tango! Bonkers!” Miss Cha Cha burst into laughter and fell against the wall again. It made me so happy to see her laughing. A small smile crept up on my face as I crunched the Cap’n Crunch.

“Well, if she feels as if some of her students can graduate to advanced class, then we can accommodate that. You know that. Ask Delilah to take over her Saturday- What? She broke up with you? She’s what?! No way, Tango! Tango, how did you not tell me this- are you okay? She’s going back home? Germany? I never expected Delilah to do that… Tango, you sure you’re okay? Do you want to meet for coffee?”

I was all ears now. I didn’t know who this Delilah was, but it sounded like the gossip wheel of their school was turning at a rapid pace. Drama at the dance school, full scale. I sighed silently, thinking about how Ambrose would be looking at me right now, his eyes wide and his mouth mid-crunch as we listened intently to Miss Cha Cha’s end of the phone. I knew I’d have to tell him about this on Friday before family group therapy. Maybe he’d know who Delilah was and would be able to fill me in on some things. Or maybe we could speculate together like we were gossiping in high school.

But this last thought turned my mood from good to bleak, because what we gossiped about in high school… We’d gossip about Miss Paula and Miss Kitty, about what they were doing and then the truth, the reality of it, came out and Miss Paula was diagnosed and…

I didn’t notice Georgina standing next to me for a few seconds, but when I did I startled.

She was silent, holding a spoon in her hand, turned to me. It took me a few seconds more to understand what she was doing.

“Oh, thank you. I should be using a spoon,” I said quietly, smiling a little bit. I took it and quickly switched out the fork for the spoon. With this I shoveled in a mouthful of Cap’n Crunch, the sweet milk taste startling me further. I hadn’t done it in such a long time, it was almost a new experience. But immediately, I noticed what Georgina was trying to do in the kitchen and the next thing I knew I was up out of my seat. “Let me help you with that! Do you want me to make you some eggs? I can make them!”

“Tango, I have to go. Yeah. Okay, I’ll meet you for coffee. Call me on my cellphone in about an hour? Okay, I have to go!” The phone slammed on the receiver and suddenly Miss Cha Cha was with us. “Ruiz, you should eat. I’ll make her some eggs, okay? Its okay.” She was making a space for herself between us, so carefully, opening the refrigerator to widen the space. Georgina was staring at her, her eyes looking distant. It made me worry. Was she okay?

But the next second, her face. Her mouth opened, just slightly but I saw it. Her eyes were troubled. But in my line of vision, I saw the clock. 6:42. I had to eat or I wouldn’t be able to eat until 1pm or more, depending on when I got back here. But her face…

I hurried back to my seat and sat down, raising my spoon but I stopped. Georgina wasn’t moving from the fridge, standing there next to Miss Cha Cha who was rummaging around carefully to get the carton of eggs out.

I sighed internally in relief when Georgina started to move. So maybe she wasn’t feeling ill or something else awful. She moved to the counter, standing there with her hands on the top of it, maybe to balance. Miss Cha Cha retrieved the eggs and started to look in a cabinet, probably for oil.

With the first spoonful of Cap’n Crunch into my mouth, Georgina started to speak and my ears which had been tuned to Miss Cha Cha’s gossip were startled to hear her speak instead. Still, they listened intently.

“I wan coo ehs,” she said quietly, but I heard her. Over the noise of what Miss Cha Cha was doing, clattering pots and pans to find one now, I didn’t think she heard. But Georgina’s words showed what I’d seen in her face. My appetite was going away, too sad. But I shoveled a spoonful of cereal into my mouth anyway, having to eat.

Finally ready, Miss Cha Cha turned on the burner. “What kind of eggs do you want? I can make poached, scrambled, a lot of kinds,” she said, turning to Georgina who hadn’t moved. But now she saw her expression, and understanding appeared on her face. My heart filled with relief that she'd seen it.

“I wan coo ehs,” Georgina repeated, quieter this time but no less clear. For sure Miss Cha Cha heard her now because her expression changed, showing this, going softer. Silence followed, awkwardly but expectant.

Sweet milk filled my mouth, shocking me. I looked down at my bowl and found there was no cereal left. I’d eaten the rest of it, watching them. I knew what that meant, but I didn’t want to leave. Staring at them, I wanted to help somehow but the helpless feeling inside me told me that I didn’t have the answers either.

But suddenly, Miss Cha Cha surprised us both. She smiled, turning the handle of the pan inward to the stove. With this, she took Georgina’s hand and as I got up she gently guided Georgina in front of the pan with herself behind her. Georgina looked confused, smaller than usual.

“You can cook this, its simple, but be careful. I’ll be right here,” Miss Cha Cha said quietly, standing behind her.

As I exited the kitchen, I felt a strange twinge in my heart at what I’d just seen. I couldn’t put my finger on this odd feeling, this tingling blip.