Beloved: Lovable, yet in a non sexual way. Able to love one without purpose of intercourse. Means special in a way that is beyond that of lust, but means the purest of love.
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L E X U S
~ Chapter Twenty Eight ~
"...I know I said some fucked up shit ta you and I'm sorry. Just- please answer." I leave a voicemail on Vanessa's phone. The thought of her getting another abortion because of me has been eating away at me this whole trip. I told her to keep the baby but I left her at the hospital when she needed me the most, I ignored all her calls for a while, and I went on a trip with another girl when I should've been by her side showing her I can be a good father. I said one thing but my actions told her another and I know she's hurting and confused, Vanessa don't have nobody just like me. I call her one more time. "Nessa I'm sorry. I know you cryin' like crazy and hurtin'. Whatever decision you made I'm fine with it, I'm so tired of fightin', I just wanna go back ta how it used to be. Call me." I hang up just as Rayne comes in the room with a tray of food.
"Morning sunshine." She smiles getting in my bed with the food. I unintentionally stare at the ceiling thinking about all the fucked up shit I been doing. "Lexus, what's wrong? You don't like bacon? I can go get you some sausages or something." She says about to get up. I laugh grabbing her arm so she don't get up. "It's not the bacon. I appreciate you goin' down and getting me breakfast but I ain't really hungry." She looks at me and I can already tell she's overthinking this whole thing in her head. "Do me a favor?" I ask setting the tray on the nightstand. "What is it?"
"Stop overthinking what I just said. I'm really just not hungry."
"Okay well what do you wanna do." She asks eating some French toast off her plate. I sigh loudly seeing her lick syrup off her lips. I wanna smoke a blunt, I wanna sleep in until about three in the afternoon, and I wanna have sex but that ain't happening while I'm out here. "What?" She covers her mouth as she chews. "Gimmie some." I open my mouth playing it off. She feeds me. "I knew you were hungry."
"Stop tryna act like you know me." She rolls her eyes. "I know you like the back of my hand."
"You wish." I steal some bacon off her plate. "Lexus you have a whole plate of food right there. Eat it." She moves her plate over like that's really gonna stop me. "Ion want that. I want what you got on your plate."
"It's the exact same thing." She frowns. "I just like eatin' off you." I look up at her to see her reaction. Getting Rayne pissed off is hilarious to me. "I could have a disease."
"Shut up, I know you don't got nothin'."
"I have the clap now you have the clap so we clap together." I laugh eating her food not bothered by what she's saying. "You don't got no damn clap shut yo ass up Rayne." She laughs pushing my hand away from her food. "Seriously though stop eating off my plate. You need to be worried about what we're doing today sir?"
"I wanna go out and get drunk." I mumble . "Let's stay in and get drunk?" She suggests. I take her up on her offer knowing this ain't really her thing but she's doing it so I can have fun.
••
"Oh shit." I laugh almost dropping the bottle of Hennessy. "Be careful." I get in the pool watching Rayne drop her robe revealing her yellow bathing suit. Setting the bottle on the cement or whatever the hell it is I help her in so I can get the full three sixty. "It's cold." Her eyes sit low from us drinking all afternoon. I take a swig straight from the bottle while Rayne looks at me.
"You're really really cute." She blurts out. "W-Wait." She holds her head. "I didn't mean to say that out loud but it's true and I know you know you're cute." I laugh at how drunk she is, I mean we're both drunk but Rayne is on a whole different level. "I-I can't believe I didn't notice it before." She laughs to herself letting her hands graze over the water. I swim closer to her holding the bottle up so I don't fuck around and get pool water in it. "We so drunk." I mumble closing the space between us. Her arms wrap around my neck. "Kiss me." I do as she says no hesitation. She slips her tongue in my mouth kissing me like she's tryna get me back to the room. "You so nasty." I mumble against her lips. I wrap my hand around her neck taking control while I grip on her thighs and butt. "Wait." She pulls away so I kiss on her neck. "Somebody's coming."
"Let em watch. Ion give a fuck." I lick down her neck then I leave pecks on her until I reach her lips but I feel her tense up. "S-Stop." She slurs pushing me. I give her her space allowing her to get out the pool and storm away. Quickly getting out I follow her trying not to stumble. "Rayne, I'm ssorry." I speed up not caring how crazy we look. "Rayne." I call her name but she ignores me. I finally catch up to her since she literally sits in the hallway crying. "I can't find our room." Tears stream down her cheeks. I look around realizing we're in front of our room so I unlock the door helping her inside. "I hate you." She mumbles. "I thought you were my friend."
"Boo, I wasn't gon' hurt you." Setting the almost empty bottle on the counter she looks at me not bothering to wipe her tears. "You weren't?" I shake my head immediately getting dizzy. "I'm sorry for thinking that. I don't know why I thought that." She hugs me. "You S-till love me?" I ask.
"Yup."
"And we still friends?" I ask. "You're my bestie and I lov- loveee you." She points at me.
