Dear Beloved,

31| True Responsibilites

L E X U S

~ Chapter Thirty One ~

"The water bill, light bill, gas." Rayne sorts through my bills for me. "Mortgage is six fifty." She counts the money out for me separating everything. "You have too much left over..did you pay the cable bill?" She looks up at me. I cuss under my breath. "Ion even know where I put tha bill."

"I put all your bills in here. This is why I organized everything so you know exactly where it's at. You gotta start paying attention." She shakes her head going over the numbers again. "Once you pay your cable bill you'll have six hundred left and you're going to put four hundred of it in your savings account so you're gonna have two hundred left for groceries, gas, and whatever else you wanna buy." she hands me the cash. I rub my head getting a headache from all these numbers. "Are you listening to me? You need to start putting away a good chunk of your check, you have a baby on the way. I don't know how many times I have to say it Lexus." I wrap my arms around her waist as she puts each bill with the money I gave her to sort through. "Boo, I'm listenin' and I'm aware I got a child on the way. Stop stressin'." I peck her cheek.  Rayne been stressing out about the baby coming more than me.

"Stop. You have less than two months to get your act and your bank account together." She removes my hands going back to what she was doing. "I'm not even gonna have tha baby like that anyways." I suck my teeth. "You still need a room set up for it so you can show her that you're serious about being a dad, that stuff's not cheap and you need to be sending her money for the baby actually you just needa look into putting yourself on child support...I'll look into it later."

"Child support?" I cock my head back. "You want me ta put myself on child support? Gone somewhere with that bogus shit." I walk away before I take my frustrations out on her when she's only trying to help me. "Lexus."

"What?"

"Come back out here and talk to me." I sit on my bed checking my phone. "I'm pissed off, just leave me alone fa ah second." I sigh loudly hearing her walk to my room. "A baby is another bill, if you didn't want that bill you should've worn a condom or you shouldn't have had sex at all. All I'm trying to do is help you prepare for your whole life to change because that's all I can do but if you're gonna keep getting "pissed off." She throws up air quotations. "Then I'll stop and you can head down the road of being a deadbea-"

"Stop talkin' slick ta me." I cut her off. This is all we've been arguing about lately and I'm starting to think this baby thing ain't sitting too well with her anymore. She crosses her arms staring at me so I know now she's mad. "Please." I rub my eyes. "We not doin this boo, we not about ta argue over tha same shit every other day. When I ask you ta give me some time please just give me that I really didn't wanna argue or say some outta pocket shit towards you over this again."

"I'll mind my business then, I'm done."

"Whatchu mean you done?" I stand up grabbing her arm. "You leaving over this petty lil fight?" I peck her cheek then her neck. "Huh?"

"I'm done with this topic. Don't ask me for help anymore if you're gonna get frustrated." She moves my hand away again like she don't want me touching her. "Wassup with you?" I ask noticing how distant she's been acting. "What do you mean?"

"I mean why you keep moving every time I kiss or touch you? You talkin' ta Jacob again?" I ask really trying to figure out the problem. A month and a half after we came back from Arizona Rayne told me she wanted to figure things out with him and now this again. "Be honest cause if you lie imma go off.

"No I'm not talking to him again."

"Well what's goin' on? Ion like you dodgin' me like this." She stands on her tippy toes giving me a kiss on the lips. "And I'm not dodging you, boo." She mocks me. "I really just wanna prepare for the baby. Vanessa said-"

"I know but I got this." I laugh cutting her off before she goes on a rant. Since we've been "talking" or "dating" Vanessa and I communicate through Rayne instead of directly talking to each other because she claims she don't want nothing to do with me. I know she just says shit like that because she's pregnant, hormonal, and by herself. It hurts my feelings but I know she'll get over it, Vanessa loves me. "She sounded really sad. She's on bed rest and she can't go to work or school-"

"I know but c'mere." I lick my lips resting my hand on her hip. I was never into kissing before but Rayne got the best kisses I ever done had. "Lexus." We could kiss for hours if I wasn't such a horny dog.

"Just a lil bit." I mumble pecking her lips before I tongue her down. "Okayyyy. I'm trying to talk." She pulls away from me. "I know she doesn't really like me much but I wanna do something nice for her, I've been talking to my dad and-"

"Why would you do that?" I frown trying to figure out with everything in me why would Rayne talk to her dad about this shitty ass situation I'm in when he already starting not to like me. "Some things is supposed ta stay between us. I shouldn't have to tell you that, damn."

"My dad can help you guys Lexus-"

"I didn't ask nobody fa help. I got a good job for right now so does Vanessa we don't need no handouts ta take care of our seed. You make me not wanna tell you shit, that's not your business to tell Rayne."

"I was just trying to help. I'm sorr-"

"Well next time don't. Think before you do shit. That's your problem right now, you always thinkin' somebody needs help when you really tha one with the issues." I mumble. Now that Rayne ran her big ass mouth I know her daddy don't like me for sure now. I light up a pre rolled blunt feeling all kinds of stress. Rayne thinks she's helping me when in reality she's making shit worse for me. Ion need all this drama. She stands there looking at me waiting to take what I said back but it's the truth and sometimes the truth hurts. I contemplate apologizing seeing her eyes water a little bit but she leaves my room and then she leaves my house all together slamming my door on the way out. I sigh laying back on my bed. It is what it is.

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