CAPTIVITY

26. Defense

(Jonathan POV)

"Finley, for the last time, get off the fridge," 

I tell this monkey child, who I find magically sitting on top of the fridge dangling his scrawny legs in only underwear as he drinks from his sippy cup. 

"How does he even get up there?" AJ asks as he stands beside me. Finley sticks up his middle finger in response to our pleas.

 "That's it, you're about to get the longest time out in the toddler history," I growl as I go to the dining room to grab a chair. 

"Wow, you just had to be a little shit today, huh Fin?" AJ grunts and I slide the chair up to the fridge. 

"Get over here!" I yell at my youngest son as he tries to hide in the back corner of the top of the fridge but I grab hold of his leg. 

"I swear to fucking god I'm covering everything in olive oil so you stop scaring the shit out me with your disappearances, We should have named you Houdini!"

I drag him off the fridge by his leg with and he screams as if I'm hurting him.

 "Daddy no!" He cries and I yank him forward, he finally slides off the fridge and into my arms but he do so with so much force we both go flying back. 

In a split second, I pull my son close to my chest to protect him at all cost and we land with a loud sickening crack. I was in so much pain that white dots clouded my vision. 

"What the fuck did I just walk into?!" I head someone yell and Finley starts to cry. 

"Daddy! Daddy, are you okay? Did I hurt you?" I hear him yell in my ear and groan as I try to sit up but someone stops me. 

"Hey, honey lay down for a few more moments. What happened AJ?" My stupid brain registers the voice to be my husband's. I still wasn't use to having him home which was why it took so long to recognize it.

 The stars disappear and I sit up.

"Is Fin okay?" I ask first, feeling a strange pain in my left arm. 

"He's fine Johnny, it's you I'm more concerned about." Ashley holds my face in his hands and I roll my eyes. 

"I'm fine," I groan and lean back against the kitchen island. Looking over to see Fin standing next to me with tears falling down his face. 

"Aish, come here buddy," I open my arms to him and he collapses into me, crying tears of guilt into my chest as I hold him with my right arm.

 "I didn't want to hurt you daddy, I promise I won't crawl on top of the fridge again," He swears through the muffled cries of my soaking wet t-shirt.

 "Hey, I need you to stop crawling on shit okay, Daddy could have been really hurt," Ash chastizes him more than I could in my weakened state. I go to stand, almost falling I catch myself by holding the counter and yelp with pain shooting up my left arm. 

"Johnny? Are you okay? What's wrong?" Ash asks what feel like a million questions and I just exhale a deep breath.

 "I'm fine," I reassure him. I knew I wasn't fine but we had his doctors appointment today and we couldn't miss it just because I was in pain.

 "Here, sit down, I'll get you coffee," he offers with an arm snaked around my waist. As he guides me to a stool on the kitchen island. 

"I'm going to take the kids ice skating. Get them out of your hair for today," AJ offers and Ashley tells him something I couldn't quite hear.

I take a small sip of coffee and Ash comes up behind me. Wrapping his long muscular arms around my waist, gently kissing the nape of my neck.

 "Nervous?" I ask, feeling strange as he does this. I know he's trying but it's still weird. I thought any affection like this was impossible coming from him.

 But I guess nothing is impossible when you're handed a death sentence. 

"No," He grunts and I instantly knew he was lying.

 "This is weird. Stop holding me and go back to the whole, I don't like to be touched thing," I remark and he chuckles slightly.

 "Well too fucking bad. You're going to have to learn how to deal with my strange affection," He says as rest his head on my shoulder. 

"I like this, just holding you like this. It's comforting," Ash whispers gently and he gives me a gentle squeeze before sitting down.

 "What else do you like?" I ask as the warmth of his embrace starts to reach my defensive heart. 

"Making you feel wanted," he whispers in such a way that I had to bite my lip to stop the shiver from running down my spine. I grip the mug tightly as I stare at the light brown liquid. 

He's lying.
He doesn't really want me.
Why would he?
I'm nothing.

 His fingers carefully intertwining with mine as he kisses my cheek, brings me out of these dark thoughts. 

"You're mine Johnny boy and I like to take care of you, love you, talk to you..." His words tickle my neck.

 "Ash, it's like nine in the morning. What are you trying to do here?" I narrow my eyes. 

Maybe he just wanted to get back together for sex.
That was the most reasonable explanation.
He doesn't really care about me or how I feel.

Ash nuzzles his head into my shoulder. 

"Nothing. I just always want you to know how much I love you." As the word love, slips from his lips I feel my heart skip a beat and try to push his arms away from me.

 "What's wrong?" I turn in the stool to look him in the eyes as he stands in front of me. 

"Why are you doing this?" I ask and his expression softens. 

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I ask and he bends over, kissing my forehead. 

"My God Johnny, I am so sorry," he says with a depressed look in his eyes. 

"What? I didn't want you to be guilty," I offer but he shakes his head. 

"No. I'm sorry for making you feel like this. I'm sorry being such an asshole to you. Jonathan, you are my everything and I never should have said half the things I said to you. For that, I'm sorry. But this is how I should have treated you all along. So from now on I'm going to treat you like you deserve to be treated. Sure, I'll still be an asshole sometimes because it's in my nature. I can't help that, but I will never mistreat you again," he swears as he caresses my cheek.

 I had never felt more attracted to this man than I did at that very moment. 

"Ash... you don't have to," 

Suddenly his beautiful hazel eyes fade away from me as he suddenly passes out. 

"ASHLEY!" I rush to the ground to help him but then I notice he had stoped breathing. 

"ASHLEY!"