After-An Allegiant fanfic

Part 25-Then

Disclaimer: If I owned Divergent I wouldn't be writing this fanfiction. 

Then:

No one speaks. A solemn mood hangs in the air. The rushing of the chasm is the only thing that I can hear, besides the rushing that is filling my ears. I still can't believe that they asked me to come with them as they did this, being as I was responsible for what happened, at least partially. But this isn't about me, or what I did. This is about Uriah. 

We stand above the chasm, Christina leaning slightly on my shoulder, her eyes swimming with tears she is trying not to spill. After Will, it didn't seem like she would ever love again, at least not soon, but I think Uriah had started to slip into her heart. 

Zeke stands with his mother and Shauna at the front of our little group. Hana grips the urn so tightly her fingers turn white. This is the last goodbye she is going to get for her child. I admire them for being able to do it so soon. I can't even think of a funeral for Tris, I don't think I could make it through it. 

Amar and George stand behind us, having came with Hana back to the city. Neither of them really knew Uriah, but they are still here to pay their respects. Grief was always a community event with the Dauntless, as if it was brave to mourn for someone. And I guess it is, to accept the hurt and try to deal with it. 

 I turn back and Amar gives me a small smile. He always looked out for me, never wrote me off for being hostile, always seemed to see the good, no matter how far deep it was buried. I never knew George before, but the resemblance to his sister is shocking, giving me a bittersweet feeling. Tori would have known exactly what to do, what to say in this moment, she always did. George seems to be more closed off than his sister, but if Amar trusts him, then I should too. 

Caleb and Cara stand off to the side, and I can tell that this is slightly uncomfortable for them. They have may have known Uriah for a little while, but that doesn't mean they know what to do in this situation. Grief is a funny thing. Some are scared of it, as it will make them less. Some feel as if they don't deserve to grieve, if they didn't know the person. But that is wrong. Grieving is only showing respect. 

"My son," Hana chokes out, and I can hear the tears in his voice. I move to stand next to the railing, and I look down into the river below. This place brings back memories, both good and bad. I can see the rock where I took Tris, but I also remember coming here and seeing her being held over the edge. The moment I saw her there, my heart constricted, and I knew that I cared about her. "You are missed. And you are loved. Everyday. No matter where you are, know that we care about you. Know that we are are always thinking of you. Every single one of us. You may have been young, but you were brave, one of the bravest I have ever met," I could see the tears silently rolling down Christina's cheek, and I could feel them falling on my own. Hana is crying, and Zeke is clenching his hands in fists, as if trying to hod back the tears, the grief. We're all ghosts of grief. "You loved so deeply, it was almost destructive. You fought hard, my dearest son, fought for what you loved. And all of us admire you for that. Wherever you are, I hope you are happy. And I hope that you know you led an extraordinary life. And I hope you feel it was worth living. I know that I couldn't have lived mine without you. I love you."

A sob escapes from Hana's mouth and Zeke puts his arm around her, not bothering to try to stop the tears. Hana buries her head in his shoulder, and Zeke eases the urn out of her hand. He slowly opens it and spreads some of his ashes into the chasm. 

"Uriah!" he calls, the sound echoing around the pit. He hands the urn to Shauna and she does the same, her voice clouded slightly with tears as she yells his name, letting it bounce off the walls and make it's way into Dauntless. Uriah. 

By the time the urn makes it's way to me, we are yelling his name as we pay tribute to his life. 

"Uriah!" I yell, letting some of his ashes fall into the chasm. As I pass on the urn I whisper quietly, "I'm sorry."

We continue on like this until the urn makes it's way back to Hana, Caleb and Cara even taking a part. She lets the rest of his ashes fall, and we all exclaim, "Uriah!" 

"We love you!" I hear Shauna yell. 

"We'll never forget you!" Christina exclaims. 

"I love you, little bro," Zeke says, before exclaims one last time, "Uriah!"

"Uriah!" We all echo.

I'm sorry. 

A/N: This chapter made me really sad to write. It was hard. Has anyone seen tfios? I loved it! It was so good!!