Harry Potter and a Collection of Oneshots

A Harmless Prank - Fred & George Weasly/Oliver Wood Smut

A/N: decided to go with a new ship again and these three were the first to come to mind. I love the twins and oliver is sexy as hell. always fantasized about a threesome with these guys

Important: the riddles belong to ToAcErTaInKiTsUnE in deviantart! Props to him/her for coming up with those sick riddles!

A/N: i am so mad at wattpad. I wrote this here, saved it and published it but when I revised it it was incomplete. Does that happen often to you all? Anyways, enough rant and enjoy! I hope you liked it as much as I did!

-"Riddle me this, Oli."- Asked Fred, hitting his brother's shoulder.

Oliver Wood, who was on his way to Quidditch practice with the Weasly twins at his side, rolled his eyes. He flitted a hand to his face, to hide the growing warmth spreading over his cheeks, and began walking faster, -"Oh, not this again. And don't call me that. I'm your captain, for Merlin's sake."

The twins, of course, ignored him, -"I'm at least 6 inches long. I leave foamy lubrication when engaged in my job. What am I?"- Said George, grinning mischievously.

Oliver's feet halted and he swallowed thickly. The warmth from his cheeks spread to his ears and temples as the first thought that came to his mind was... inappropriate, to put it mildly. Why are they embarrassing him like this? Of course, the twins were famous for their pranks and jokes but this has gotten too far.

-"I... I don't know,"- Oliver replied, shrugging and trying to appear cool, -"What is it?"

Fred and George moved forward, in front of Oliver, and looked at each other, grinning. A cold shiver ran down Oliver's spine. He knew those faces too well.

-"That's no fun."- Said George, tutting and shaking his head.

-"Don't tell us you've forgotten the rules of the game already, Oli."- Added Fred.

Gods, Oliver hates that acronym, -"Don't call me that."- He spat by instinct.

-"You're supposed to guess, Oli."- Fred ignored him.

-"I said-"

-"And say the first thing that comes to that bawdy head of yours."- George finished, poking Oliver's forehead.

-"B-bawdy?"- Oliver scoffed, swatting George's fingers away and leaning on his own broom to appear casual, -"What makes you think that?"

-"Tell us, then."- Fred challenged, looking smug.

-"If you're as innocent as you claim to be it shouldn't be too hard, right?"- George winked at him.

Oliver's heart joggled and he looked away, blinking to clear his mind of that image. He gulped. There was sweat trickling down his temple, -"Okay, fine. Whatever. Make it quick."

-"Right,"- Fred cleared his throat, -"I go in hard. I come out soft. You blow me hard. What am I?"

Oliver nearly gasped, jolting and causing his broom to fall. Pictures of cocks did not just flashed in his mind! -"Hey! Th-that's cheating! Not fair."

-"We just changed the riddle, Oli. Get off your high horse."- George snickered in his hands.

-"Getting worked up, eh?"- Fred drawled, wriggling his eyebrows and elbowing Oliver's ribs, -"What'd you think of?"

The Quidditch captain pushed his teammate and dusted his uniform, looking for a way to dissimulate his increasing fluster, -"Nothing because I was thinking of the other riddle."

-"Oh really?"- George raised an eyebrow.

-"Then tell us."

-"I can't. That riddle's old, expired. Remember the rules?"- It was Oliver's turn to look smug, proud of himself for one-upping the twins. Two against one was difficult though, -"Just tell me the answer."