Not Your Luna--The Broken Bond (book 1 COMPLETED)

Chapter 35

May 17, 2020 edited

Not perfect but better...No plot changes

JENSON'S POV

I scrambled in my brain on what to say but no matter how it came out the end result was the same. I caused her this pain and there was no way to say sorry for that. Even though I had never thought it would have hurt her. I did it to forget about her. I did it so I could stay in control of my wolf. I did it because I was a complete selfish asshole. It was Tony who started to explain. I wanted to scream at him to shut up but I couldn't. I deserved everything she could possibly say or do to me. I stood there and watched her while Tony talked. Her body was still except for the odd flinch which had me flinch. I could feel what she was feeling now. I accepted the bond and even though it was already growing, being this close to her just increased the pull. Accepting her just opened the gates to her soul. Not that I needed to feel anything since her face told it all.

This was the first time I really saw who she was. She was so strong but kept almost everything buried deep inside. Oh I saw the anger but I also knew it was a defence mechanism more than half the time. She didn't want people to get close to her. She didn't want anyone to know when she was hurt, happy, sad, or anything that wasn't anger. Now only if I had realized just how strong she was before all this. Before I did things I could never take back and probably never make up for. I was a complete utter fool. I was weak and deserved to lose her. I just hope it wasn't to death.

I saw when everything clicked. What I did. What everything meant. Her voice was so cold I felt my heart break. "You did this to me? You knew about the pain? You knew and still didn't reject me even though all those fucking whores meant more to you then saying a few simple words to me!" I didn't know what to say. There was nothing to say. I didn't know she would be in pain but I wasn't sure if anyone would believe me now after everything. I was afraid to open my mouth. All I could do is watch her walk to me slowly. "One fucking sentence was all it would have taken and this would have been over! Your fucking douchebag!" She screamed right before she came at me. I could see she wanted my death and I was going to give it to her. It was the very least I could do for what I put her through. I didn't deserve to live after this. She deserved to be free.

She was on me in a flash. She was fast and strong but still nothing hurt. I heard my nose break but no pain followed. I allowed each blow to connect and prayed for the pain but nothing hurt more than what I felt inside. I could feel everything she felt. Her anger was not even half of the pain she felt. She was devastated with my actions and her heart was breaking. That pain still wasn't enough. I deserved so much more.

When Nick and Tony grabbed her and pulled her off me I immediately missed her touch. I wanted to go to her and wrap my arms around her and let her do what she needed to do to me. Instead I slowly stood up, accepting the physical pain that was finally showing up after her body had left mine and I watched her.

"You know what Jenson?" Mac said, breathing hard. Her ice cold eyes glared into mine. "You want to play your little games? That's fine baby. Game fucking on! Payback is a bitch!"

My blood ran cold. "You are mine!" I roared. "Only mine! No one will come near you and if they do I will kill them!" There was no way in hell anyone was going to touch her. Even if that meant locking her up till I could try to fix this mess I created.

She let out this horrible terrifying laugh. "Well I guess you should have thought of that before. Maybe you will remember that when you start to feel that burn rise in your chest right before you want to scream when you feel like you are being ripped in half. Just remember when you feel that I will be letting that guy fuck me HARD!"

That was when I lost all my control. My wolf took over and dove at her. Not to hurt her but to put her somewhere safe. Safe from herself and away from everyone else. I had no doubt she meant everything she just said. She would do exactly that. Oh I deserved it alright but I also knew that it would hurt herself more in the long run. I may not have known her as well as Tony but I could feel everything she was feeling. The emotional pain that was raging through her just a few minutes ago was pushed down and now was only cold anger, betrayal and fear. I understood all those things. I have been fighting them since the day she walked in the door. There was a reason why we were fated mates but it took me too damn long to figure that out. Where I held strength she struggled and where she exceeded I failed. We were the others complete other half. We would have helped the other fight against our weakness and pushed to become even stronger. And now I lost the only thing that would have made me complete.

Either Corey misunderstood my intentions or didn't care. I was so focused on Mac I didn't see him fly at me from the side but I felt it. I also felt as I hit the ground hard. Fuck the guy was strong. Even stronger than me and he wasn't even the next alpha in line. Where the hell did he get that extra power from? I swear it wasn't there yesterday. I remember feeling the air as Corey tossed my body back away from Mac as the same time I felt a spike of fear run through my body. It wasn't mine.

"TONY!" The earth shattering scream came from Mac a moment before my body stiffened. My body was paralyzed right before it felt like I was being ripped in half and my skin was the only thing that kept me together.

I knew I was standing when I heard that scream because I saw Mac collapse to the floor but when I opened my eyes again I was staring at the ceiling with everyone yelling. I felt a sting across my face before my father's head popped into view. He looked scared, I had never seen him ever look scared. When I held eye contact with him he relaxed.

"Thank Goddess. Son you need to block Mac out now, I can't hold onto it when you are conscious." He was saying. It took me a second to understand what he was talking about. I almost ignored him but when I heard others yelling which snapped me back into the now. I had to help Mac. I was the only one that could. I pulled the walls up in my head blocking everyone out including Mac.

All these weeks I desperately did whatever I could not to feel her in my head and body but now when I slammed that door to her I felt empty. I struggled to sit up to look around to see what was actually happening. My eyes immediately landed on the back of Nick, Tony and Corey. They all were kneeling in front of Mac, blocking her body from me. I needed to see her. Needed to be closer to her so I stood on shaky legs. When I took my first step the screams stopped and so did the yelling. My father was now halfway between myself and Mac and he stopped dead.

Nick, Tony and Corey slowly stood up and stepped back but I still couldn't see Mac. I could hear her heartbeat and it was slowing down to a regular beat. That steady beat that I could hear anywhere was soothing. She was ok. Thank the goddess she was ok. I think I asked out loud.

I could see a flash of silver between Nick's legs as he stood with the others. I felt the uncontrollable raw rage hit me from across the room. I heard my father yell to get someone out of here. Then I saw the most amazingly beautiful thing that I had ever seen. Mac in her wolf form.

We were all stunned. It was so many things that had us all stunned. She was now standing on all fours after her successful shift, she was bigger than any she-wolf I had ever seen, and to top it off she had the most beautiful colouring I had ever seen. She was silver with a little patch of dark grey on her chest.

What I didn't notice at first was her eyes. By the time I did it was too late. I felt the rage a few moments ago but once I saw her everything else just disappeared. I subconsciously heard my father say something, I noticed Tony and Corey's attention being drawn away. I remembered taking another step towards Mac. What I didn't see right away was the pure hatred in her eyes. No not her eyes but her wolf's. I didn't notice that Mac was not there but it was her wolf and only her wolf. I didn't see when she started to move closer. And I sure the hell didn't see when her body tensed right before she lunged. I stood there as I watched this most amazing creature come at me with only one train of thought. My death. She was coming for me. For the immediate kill.