A world without you

Chapter 26 - Hiccup's POV

I woke up that morning not knowing where I was at first. Then I remembered, I had found my mother when we was on vacation. Then of course I also remembered what day it was and the sorrow came over me like a big wave of pain. For a few moment I couldn't do anything else than lying there trying to breathe through the pain. It hurt so much. I took Astrid's axe and held it tight. Then I got up. The others was eating breakfast when I came to them.
"Good morning." Mom greeted with a smile but I couldn't smile back
"Good morning." I said. She looked at me with a look like if she knew that something was wrong for a moment but was all normal before anyone noticed.
"Breakfast?" Heather asked with a look like if she told me that if she had to eat today then so was I. I took a piece of bread and started to eat.
I spend most of the day with mom, we had a lot to catch up on, but I couldn't focus on what we said. The pain this day brought was to much. When we got back I said that I was going for a flight. Heather nodded at me like if she understood.
"Okay but come back soon." said my mom
"I promise." I said.
We flied until we were above the clouds. Finally I could cry and scream. I screamed until I had lost all my strength to scream and I cried until I had no more tears to cry.  Toothless let me do it, he knew that this helped me.
I got back to the cave and ate dinner with mom. Fishlegs and Heather sat and talked, Ruff and Tuff was doing something weird as usual and Snoutlout was eating next to Hookfang.
"Okay so tell me the truth now." Mom ordered and looked me straight into my eyes
"What is wrong with you today?" She asked. I had waited for this question but didn't exactly know how to answer it
"This is a hard day for me."
"Why?"
"I had a girlfriend. You would have really liked her. She was brave, kind,  smart, amazing. I loved her more than anything. It would have been our second anniversary today. But she was... killed." I said, trying to stop the tears. My mom didn't react like I had expected. She didn't look compassionate or sad or anything. I had never seen such a expression before.
"Oh Thor. Oh Thor! Oh Thor!" she exhaled panicked almost. The others looked up on her.
"What is it?" I asked worried
"I'm so sorry. I was so happy over that I had found you that I forgot to tell you. I'm so sorry!" She said but seemed to be somewhere else
"Mom! What have you forgotten to tell me?" I said loudly to get her attention. She looked at me and everyone was looking at her
"Your Girlfriend? Astrid?
"Yeah, how...?" I asked
"She's alive."